HR and Recruiting: The Unspoken Rules

Some unsaid rules guide us through HR. They’re not really hard and fast rules, just practical tips that we’ve learned along the way. Let’s break them down:

  1. Stay away from personal questions in interviews.
  2. Keep reference checks simple – just confirm dates of employment.
  3. Guard employee files like they’re top-secret.
  4. If it’s important, put it in a policy.
  5. Take every accusation seriously and look into it.
  6. “Mutual decision to leave” usually means otherwise.
  7. Measurement gets things done.
  8. Be careful about setting precedents.
  9. Expect things to go haywire on day 2 of your vacation.
  10. A candidate hasn’t really accepted the job until they show up to work on Day 1.
  11. If it’s on the ‘roadmap’ of your HR or Recruiting technology vendor, it means it’s not actually built and might never be built.
  12. Employees tattling on others probably have their own issues.
  13. Employee harassment stories are rarely simple.
  14. Open enrollment meetings need cookies.

We love our rules in HR! Ironically, I love the profession so much because I’m a low-rules kind of person. The reality is, in my couple decades of HR and recruiting work there really has only been one Rule of Thumb that has been the same at every organization I’ve worked in. Big and small. Public and private. Across all industries…

– Things change.

This basic principle reminds us that flexibility is crucial in the ever-shifting HR landscape. What’s your go-to rule in HR and recruiting?

Employees Want You To Tell Them This

“Can I be honest with you?” is a phrase usually followed by some sh*t you don’t want to hear.  We talk about this concept a bunch in HR. We need to tell our employees the truth about their performance.  We work to coach managers of people on how to deliver this message appropriately.  We develop complete training sessions and bring in ‘professional’ communicators to help us out on the exact phraseology we want to use.  All so we can be ‘honest’ with our employees.

Can I be honest with you?

No one wants you to be honest with them.

Employees want you to tell them this:

  1. You’re doing a good job.
  2. We like having you on the team.
  3. You’re better than most of the others here.
  4. Your career looks promising, and a promotion might be on the horizon.
  5. Here’s your yearly raise.

But that’s only true for about 5% of your crew. The other 95%? Well, they won’t be thrilled with total honesty.

Talent management is a tough nut to crack. No fancy software can fix this. Most folks don’t dig straight-up honesty. It’s uncomfortable, causes drama, and people don’t like hearing they need to step up. Tell someone there’s ‘room for improvement,’ and they think you just called them a failure about to get the boot.

As managers, we tend to dance around the truth. We all have things to get better at, but saying it out loud stings. If someone says they’re cool with feedback, they’re probably lying to you and themselves. Those are the ones who lose it when they hear the truth. People who say they want honest feedback actually want to hear they’re rock stars. Anything less, and they freak out.

So, what’s the real solution?

Say nothing. Set clear metrics for performance. Make sure everyone gets them. When an employee asks for feedback, hand over the metrics and let them spill first. That way, you can agree or disagree. Otherwise, it’s all just opinions, and opinions and honesty don’t mix well.

But hey, you already knew that. Thanks for stopping by. You’re doing a solid job – way better than the other readers. Keep it up, and you’re on the up-and-up!

The Power of Words in a Job Description

Once upon a time (it was a decade ago, but I don’t want to feel old) I wrote about a cool study where Wired teamed up with OkCupid and Match.com. They crunched tons of data from popular dating profiles and found the top 1000 words that got the most clicks. Now, I’m thinking if these words can get people together in dating, maybe they can also get folks interested in jobs.

I’m not just revisiting the topic; I’m going a bit further and tweaking these words to fit the changes in the past 10 years. I get it; words that work for dating might sound weird for jobs, but hear me out. It’s time to rewrite job descriptions to ditch the boring HR talk and be more real and appealing.

Here are the seven sets of words that data says work for getting more dates hires:

  1. Active Life Words: Throw in words like yoga, surfing, pilates, cross fit, hiking, hot girl walk – things that show your company’s active side.
  2. Pop Culture Vibes: Toss in references to things like Ted Lasso, Stranger Things, or Michael Scott. It gives your company a personality. Go ahead and mention Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce while you’re at it. Haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate.
  3. Music Words: Check out the top trending artists on Spotify or Apple Music. Add them in. A couple of lines of lyrics work, too. It adds a bit of musical flair to your job descriptions. Taylor Swift works in this category too.
  4. Chill Words: Use words like ocean, meditation, trust, therapeutic, and balanced – things that make your job sound calm and secure, which is a big deal nowadays.
  5. Foodie Feel: Words like chocolate, appetizers, sushi, happy hour, or Starbucks bring people together. Everyone eats. Share your company’s food scene.
  6. Power Words: Drop in terms like creative, motivated, ambitious, innovative, and passionate. Make your job descriptions more interesting than just the legal stuff.
  7. Spontaneity: Tattoos, f*ck, wasted, kissing, puppies, sucking, lucky, these words haven’t changed in 10 years. Stuff you wouldn’t normally find in a job ad – we threw it in just because. It might not be everyone’s cup of tea, but it could catch the eye of the newer generation.

Here’s an idea, just do the job you were hired for

Every day, people get worked up over stuff they can’t control. Everyone’s telling you to be this or that, depending on the latest trend or generation.

I’ve stopped listening to people who don’t know my job or haven’t been in the field for ages. Instead, I talk to my employees – the young, the old, and everyone in between. They all matter because they all contribute to moving the organization forward.

I don’t care about what others think; I focus on what my employees are telling me. Their problems are personal, from daycare and student loans to health scares. Forget the big world issues; help them with the close ones first.

Your employees are individuals with their own problems, and millennials aren’t college kids anymore. The newbies might have different labels, but they’re still young people with their own issues.

At the end of the day, employees want to succeed. Helping them be successful is my top priority as a leader. Success is personal, so I figure out how to tie it to the organization’s goals.

We keep letting others tell us how to do our jobs. I’m sticking to doing the job I was hired for because, frankly, no one knows it better than me. Maybe we should all just focus on doing the job we were hired for.

Ping pong and Taco Tuesday won’t save you!

Check out this previous blog from 2017 – it’s like the Yoda of employee retention. You don’t need to keep everyone! Crazy, right? Does this still hit the mark? Share your quick take!

You Don’t Actually Have To Retain Everyone!

In 2017, and beyond, employee retention will become a huge focus. Some could argue that employee retention is always an important issue, but during major recessions, it becomes less of a stress for sure. With shifting employee demographics, retention will be a hot item over the next few years as we see more and more of the baby boom generation leave the workforce, and we do not have enough young skilled workers entering the workforce to replace those leaving.

Here’s a dirty little secret, though:

“You don’t actually have to work to retain every one of your employees!”

Why? Because most of your employees won’t leave. We like to tell ourselves that every employee can leave, and by the law of the land (at least for now under the Trump administration), they actually can, but statistics clearly show that most don’t leave.

The average retention rate across all industries is about 85%, year over year. That means 85 out of 100 employees will probably not leave you. You are really worrying about 10-15% of employees. Ironically, it’s about 10-15% of your top-performing employees that make the most difference in your company.

First, we have to solve one problem you have. Your ‘retention’ strategy is flawed and is pushing good employees out the door, the ones you want to keep!

Here’s why:

  1. You’re smart and send out a retention survey to find out from all of your employees what they want to be retained. You’re like 99% of organizations.
  2. The results of that survey tell you what the majority of your employees want to be retained. Things like ping pong, hot yoga, 27 smoke breaks a day, free tacos on Tuesday, etc.
  3. You implement a variety of the desired retention ‘fixes’! Yay!!!
  4. Your retention number actually stays the same, or maybe even gets worse.

WTF!?!?!?

Remember what I said above? You shouldn’t be concerned with about 85% of your employees who will never leave. They are not going anywhere! You shouldn’t be surveying all of your employees, you should be surveying only your best employees, those you are desperate to keep!

What you’ll find is that the 10-15% of highly valued employees you want to retain, what they want to be retained is very different from what the hoard wants to be retained! They’ll want a clear career path, performance-based compensation, more talented co-workers, better work tools, etc. They couldn’t give a shit about ping pong and Taco Tuesday.

Great HR isn’t working to make everyone equal. Great HR is working to make your organization better than your competition. That happens by having noticeably better talent. You get that kind of talent by listening to those employees who are noticeably better, not those who complain about the color of your new carpet.

What would this create?  It creates a high performing organization that attracts high-performing employees. Most organizations won’t do this because they believe they need to work to retain all of their employees. “We’re all high performing, Tim!” No, you’re not. Once you get that idea out of your head, you can do some really cool, industry changing stuff!

Hey, Be A Career Guide

Remember what Steve Jobs said – people don’t know what they want until you show them. This applies to careers too. You might think you want a specific job title or hit certain goals, but the reality hits differently.

I once told my wife I wanted to be a vice president by 35 when I was 25. Got there, and it didn’t feel any different. It turns out, what I really wanted was control. Titles didn’t matter; I wanted to be the one calling the shots.

As a leader, I’ve noticed maybe 10% of the people you guide know exactly what they want in their careers. The other 90% are like me back then – they think they know but are just winging it until they hit some goal.

Most employees don’t really know what they want in their careers. That’s where leaders come in. It’s our job to help them figure it out.

Your job as a leader is to show your team what they want. Don’t assume they already know – most don’t. They won’t admit it, but that shouldn’t stop you from pointing out the possibilities.

From my own experience, the best leaders I had showed me the way. Four mentors in my life called me out on my title obsession and guided me in the right direction. They didn’t give up on me, and I’m grateful for that.

So, leaders, your role is like a career guide. Help your people see the path, and you’ll see them step up and do more than they thought possible.

The Career of a Mediocre Recruiter

Shoutout to Aerotek for being the pioneers in figuring out how long it takes for someone to realize they’re not cut out for recruiting – usually around 9-14 months in the game. Whether you’ve barely dipped your toes in Talent Acquisition for 13 minutes or have been in the field for a while, you’ve likely come across tons of resumes that tell a familiar story.

Just having some recruiting experience, especially in IT or Technical stuff, can keep you in the game for a good ten years or more, even if you’re not the best at it. As the President of a recruiting firm, and someone who has run corporate TA shops for years, I’ve seen these candidates pop up regularly:

  1. They kick off their recruiting journey fresh out of college, working at a big agency sweatshop for 9-12 months. They leave, citing issues with the management style, but truth is, they couldn’t meet their goals. Cut them some slack – those sweatshops are tough.
  2. Next, they usually move to another agency or a small corporate gig, lasting less than 9 months. Same old story – couldn’t hack it the first time, and it’s not likely to change now!
  3. If they’re playing smart, they jump ship from the second gig to a big corporate role with tons of recruiters, buying them about 24 months before being exposed as a recruiting flop. In these big places, it’s more about posting and praying than actual recruiting, so they can survive a bit longer.
  4. Eventually, the big organizations catch on that they’re not bringing much to the table. But armed with the big corporate name on their resume, they snag a senior recruiter role with another big firm. The big secret is, they have no secrets, and neither did the last big org they worked for. Once the fake secrets run out, it’s time to start scouting for a recruiting manager gig in about 18 months.
  5. They grab the first recruiting manager job they can find at a mid-sized firm, with high expectations because of their big company experience. Spoiler alert – they’re out the door in 9 months.
  6. Back to the agency world they go! Bouncing around, bragging about their ‘contacts’ at big companies, they’ve hit the 8-10 year mark in their recruiting career, and they’re just not cutting it.

If they’re lucky as a mediocre recruiter, they might land a gig with a college or university, or something. These places are like havens for subpar recruiters. No pressure to do anything valuable – just show up, get a paycheck, and follow the process. It’s never their fault, and moving too fast isn’t on the agenda!

The best recruiters don’t move around because they’re so valuable the organizations they work for won’t let them leave! If you’re crappy, people are hoping you leave! Please take your crappy recruiting skills to our competition!

5 HR Habits to Drop Now

Are you doing everything you can to be a top-notch HR pro? Sometimes, it’s essential to take a step back and see if certain habits might be holding you back.

Here’s my list of what habits are holding us back as a profession:

  1. Keep It Personal: In HR, relationships matter. Instead of relying on emails or texts, try talking face-to-face or picking up the phone. Building real connections helps create a positive workplace and makes you a more effective HR professional.
  2. Be Open-Minded in Hiring: Don’t let small things affect your hiring choices. Whether it’s where someone went to school (God forbid they went to your rival) or how they shake hands, focus on what really matters – their skills and qualifications.
  3. Deal with Salary Realities: It’s easy to get frustrated about pay differences between departments. But instead of dwelling on it, concentrate on excelling in your HR role. Understand that each department has its challenges, and your HR skills are crucial in their own way. No one wants to hear about it.
  4. Skip the Power Trip: Avoid using power just for the sake of it. True influence comes from collaboration, not strict rules. Approach your role as someone who facilitates, helping people succeed without unnecessary control.
  5. See the Bigger Picture: While HR is important, it’s not the only show in town. Shift your focus from thinking HR is superior to understanding how you can contribute to the whole organization. Use your HR skills to make everyone’s life easier.

If you want to be a better HR pro, start with these simple steps:

  • Regularly talk to colleagues in different departments. Find out what challenges they’re facing, not just HR issues, and offer real help. This “Business Partner” approach goes beyond typical HR duties and makes you a valuable asset.
  • Learn on the Job: Don’t worry if you don’t know everything about every department. Talk to your peers, learn from them, and use your problem-solving skills to contribute to their issues. Being willing to understand different parts of the business will make you a better HR professional.

Improving as an HR pro is about letting go of limiting habits and being more collaborative and supportive. This way, you’ll become a more effective and valued member of your organization.

Make my birthday wish come true!?

Guess what?

It’s my birthday! Let’s make this one for the books – literally! The only thing I want is for you to go pre-order my new book The Talent Fix, Vol. 2. Head over to the pre-order page, secure your copy, and let the countdown to the book release begin!

I’m beyond grateful for your ongoing support and am lucky to continue sharing this incredible journey with you. Cheers to another year of growth, learning, and a leader’s guide to recruiting great talent.

Career Roulette

BookofOdds.com has a piece titled Hey Kids, Choose Your Career that breaks down the chances of your kid (or any kid, really) landing in a particular job. on consideration for both of them. As you can imagine the article gives some of the fun careers first, like the odds my kid will be a:

  • Surgeon: 1 in 2,872
  • Pro Athlete: 1 in 9,684
  • Fashion Model: 1 in 81,440
  • Firefighter: 1 in 452
  • Elementary Teacher: 1 in 87

Because you know, we all thought we were going to be one of those when we grew up!

When I did a career test in high school, it didn’t tell me I’d end up in HR. It gave me my top 3 choices, which were kind of weird: 1. Teacher; 2. Floral Designer; 3. Sales. No idea how “Floral Designer” got in there, but I still love gardening. HR wasn’t even on the list.

Thinking about my sons, realistically, they’re most likely to end up in:

  • Administrative Role: 1 in 5
  • Sales: 1 in 9
  • Food Service: 1 in 11
  • Healthcare: 1 in 19
  • Education: 1 in 16

But what about HR?

Human Resources: 1 in 656.9

The odds for Human Resources (HR) at 1 in 656.9 shows how jobs can be all over the place, and your career journey can be a bit of a rollercoaster. Even if we’ve got certain ideas about what we want for our kids, the job market can throw some curveballs. Landing an HR job isn’t something you’d bet on every day, but it’s a cool reminder that surprises can pop up in unexpected places when it comes to careers. So, while we might have some thoughts about where our kids will end up, the job scene has a way of keeping us on our toes with its own surprises.