HR and TA Technology You’ll Fall In Love With!

Happy Valentine’s Day! I have a gift for you!

My friend, President of Recruiting Daily, and super brilliant HR Technologist, William Tincup puts together a quarterly list of HR and TA technology that he loves titled: 100+ HR and Recruiting Technologies Worth Watching. I get so many great ideas of companies off his list to demo, I wanted to share it with you, and if you’re smart, you’ll go follow William and get his updates to this list on a quarterly basis.

Some of these companies are well known, some I haven’t even heard about, but if William tells me to take a look, I take a look!

Here’s my recommendation. You know where your HR and TA tech stack are failing. Demo one company a month in your weak areas. These demos will show you a few things. First, you’ll see what’s possible. Second, you’ll get to see how other companies are doing the same thing, only better. Finally, you’ll probably get some ideas of how to do your stuff better, with or without the technology.

Either way, you win.

If you want to give me a gift, please send me a note once you demo’d one of these companies and let me know what you think! The sharing of information between peers is the real power.

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The Rules for Office Romances

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. As HR pros we know what this means, which is usually a lot of unwanted advances by horny dudes who think they have a shot at the hot co-worker, who has absolutely no interest in them at all.

Welcome to the show, kids!

I’ve given out some rules in the past. Everyone on the planet has read my Rules for Hugging at the Office, but Office Romances are a little more complicated than the simple side-hug in the hallway. So, I thought I would lay out some easy to follow, simple rules for Office Romances for you to pass out to your employees on Valentine’s Day:

Rule #1 – Don’t fall for someone you supervise. If you do fall for someone you supervise, which you probably will because this is how office romances work. In that case, get ready to quit, be fired, be moved to another department, and or get the person you’re having an office romance with fired, moved, etc.

Rule #2 – Don’t fall for anyone in Payroll. When it ends, so will your paycheck. At least temporarily, and even then it will be filled with errors from now until eternity. It’s a good rule of thumb to never mess with payroll for any reason.

Rule #3 – Don’t mess around in the office, or on office grounds. Look I get it. You’re crazy in love and just can’t wait until you get home. The problem is the security footage never dies. It will live long past your tenure with us, and we’ll laugh for a long time at you. So, please don’t.

Rule #4 – Don’t send explicit emails to each other at work. It’s not that I won’t enjoy reading them, it’s that I get embarrassed when I have to read them aloud to the unemployment judge at your hearing. Okay, I lied, I actually don’t get embarrassed, but you will.

Rule #5 – Don’t pick a married one. Look I get it, you’re the work spouse. He/She tells you everything. You get so close, you really think it’s real, but it’s not. You’ll actually see this when the real spouse shows up and keys your car in the parking lot.

Rule #6 – Don’t pick someone who has crappy performance. Oh, great, you’re in love! Now I’m firing your boyfriend and you’ll have to pick between him and us, which you’ll pick him, and now I’m out two employees. Pick the great performers, it’s easier for all of us.

Rule #7 – Inform the appropriate parties as soon as possible. Okay, you went to a movie together, not a big deal. Okay, you went to the movie together and woke up in a different bed than your own. It might be time to mention this to someone in HR, if there is at anyway a conflict of some sort. If you don’t know if there’s a conflict of some sort, let someone in HR help you out with that.

Rule #8 – If it seems wrong, it probably is.  If you find yourself saying things in your head like, “I’m not sure if this is right”, you probably shouldn’t be having that relationship. If you find yourself saying things like, “If this is wrong, I don’t want to be right”, you definitely shouldn’t be having this relationship.

Rule #9 – If you find yourself hiding your relationship at work, it might be time to talk to HR. We’re all adults, we shouldn’t be hiding normal adult relationships. If you feel the need to hide it, something isn’t normal about it.

Rule #10 – Everyone already knows about your relationship. People having an office romance are the worst at hiding it. You think you’re so sneaky and clever, but we see you stopping at her desk 13,000 times a day ‘asking for help’ on your expense report. We see you. We’re adults. We know what happened when you both went into the stairwell 7 seconds apart. Stop it.

There you go. Hope that helps. Have a great Valentine’s Day!

The Top 25 Rap Lyrics That Shaped My Leadership Style

It’s the Holidays and I’m taking a break from writing and sharing some of my most read posts of 2016! Enjoy! 

This post was actually written in 2012 at the end of series of 25 posts I did. It’s crazy, but ever since it’s been one of my most read posts each year since. Rap lyrics and leadership make for great SEO! I’ve also picked up a ton of rap artists as followers of my social media accounts and they will frequently send me private messages and ask me to share their tweets, which I find extremely funny, knowing my personal demographic of being a middle-aged white dude in the Midwest!

Also, this year for the first time I had a local SHRM chapter ask me to come in and give this presentation! If you’re in HR and you’ve gone to SHRM chapter meetings, can you ever imagine going and getting presented to with slides of rappers and me spitting rhymes and leadership theory!? Let’s just say it would be the best presentation you ever attended!

In 2012 I did blog series on The Top 25 Rap Lyrics that shaped my leadership style.  The posts, individually, still get clicked a ton, so I decided to do a compilation of the 25 posts to make it easier for new readers to find all 25 (I know my family is really proud of me right now!). Taken out of context of the original post, you might be asking yourself “How the hell did this shape his leadership style?” If you find yourself asking that, click through the link to read the explanation!

Here you go – The Top 25 Rap Lyrics That Shaped My Leadership Style with links to the original posts:

1. “It’s like the more money we come across, the more problems we see” -Notorious B.I.G.

2. “Today I didn’t even have to use my A.K., I got to say it was a good day” -Ice Cube

3. “What does it take to be number 1? Two is not a winner and three nobody remembers.” -Nelly

4. “I’m not a businessman. I’m a business, man.” -Jay-Z

5. “When I wake up, people take up, mostly all of my time. I’m not singin’, phone keep ringin’, so I make up a rhyme.” -RUN DMC

6. “It’s funny how someone else’s success brings pain.” -Drake

7. “Success is my drug of choice…” – 50 Cent

8. “Forgive, but don’t forget.” -2Pac

9. “True happiness is not acquired, and you won’t find it on sale.” -Outkast

10. “At exactly which point do you realize, that life without knowledge is death in disguise.” -Talib Kweli

11. “You’re young and dumb and quick with the tongue.” -Kool Mo Dee

12. “I hear the criticism loud and clear.  That is how I know that the time is near. So we become alive in a time of fear” -Nicki Minaj

13. “We all self conscious. I’m just the first to admit it.” -Kanye West

14. “Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity, To seize everything you ever wanted in one moment, Would you capture it or just let it slip?” -Eminem

15. “Now you can be a victim, or you can lock and load.” -50 Cent

16. “They say I need to learn, but nobody’s here to teach me. If they don’t understand, how can they reach me?” -Coolio

17. “You’re nobody till someone kills you.” -Notorious B.I.G.

18. “Pay us like you owe us for all the years that you hold us.  We can talk, but money talksso talk mo’ bucks.” -Jay-Z

19. “I had nothing, and I wanted it; You had everything, and you flaunted it...” -Ice T

20. “He’s only mediocre, jealousy can’t get with me.” -LL Cool J

21. “Elvis shaved his head when he went into the Army.” -Beastie Boys

22. “When the grass is cut, the snakes will show.” -Jay-Z

23. “ya know a lot of people believe that that word Love is real soft, but when you use it in your vocabulary like your addicted to it, it sneaks right up and takes you right out. So, for future reference, remember it’s alright to like or want a material item, but when you fall in love with it and you start scheming and carrying on for it, just remember, it’s gonna get’cha.” -KRS-1

24. “I think about more than I forget; but I don’t go around fire expecting not to sweat.” -Little Wayne

25. “Change, shit I guess change is good for any of us. Whatever it take for any of y’all niggaz to get up out the hood. Shit, I’m wit cha, I ain’t mad at cha.Got nuttin but love for ya, do your thing boy.” – 2 Pac

The One Gift HR Really Wants for Christmas

Ok, before we get started, stop it. I could have titled this “The One Thing HR Wants for the Holidays” or “The One Thing HR Wants for Chanukah”, etc., but I didn’t the majority of people celebrate Christmas, so I used Christmas. Breath in HR people. (for the record we celebrate both Chanukah and Santa in my house, my kids are equal gift getters!).

So, what would it be? If you could have one thing in HR for Christmas, what would you ask for?

And don’t be lame, “Oh Tim, I would just ask for world peace and have Snapple bring back Compassion Berry” No you wouldn’t! Not if it was real, I mean really real!

I’m sure a bunch of HR Pros would ask for a new HRIS System. I mean that’s what we do during the holidays, we want the biggest baddest fastest new electronic device that will make our lives easier and make us look 10 pounds thinner!   Maybe just an add-on system like a new CRM, or employee referral automation, or mobile employee feedback app, they are all cool and hip!  Who wouldn’t like one of those!?

I’m sure a bunch of HR Pros would ask for the ability to Hire more employees!  What a gift that would be.  Not only for the people getting hired but for your overwork staff and hiring managers who have worked double and triple duty because your cheap boss won’t open up headcount.  HR never has the staff it wants!

I’m sure a bunch of HR Pros would ask for a new Employment Brand!  Oh to be as sexy as Google, Zappos or Sodexo – wouldn’t that be a wonderful environment to work in HR.  Life just seems easier when you work for a sexy brand.  It isn’t actually – but that what great branding does, it makes some idiot like me think it must be easy to work in a great place like that – they should hire me!

I’m sure a bunch of HR Pros would ask for better Talent for their organizations (which is technically way more than one gift but let’s face it, some of us HR Pros don’t follow directions well!).   This is the freaking holy grail, right!  If we only had the top talent (instead of saying we only hire top talent, then hire those who respond to our posts) our lives would be so much easier!

There are so many things we could ask for in HR, but this is why I love HR, for all those gifts I listed above, and for so many more you and I could come up with. We work in a profession where we have the ability to deliver each and every one of those to our organizations.  With enough time, patience, influence, strategy and luck, not one of those things I couldn’t give my organization.  Maybe that’s the best gift of all.

For the record, mine? It would be a ‘Visionary Leader’. That’s the one gift I would ask for.

Those are rare, those are hard to find.  Not many of us get the opportunity to work with a true visionary. Great managers, strong leaders, charismatic personalities, yes; But a Visionary Leader, that is something few get the opportunity to experience.

What would be your One gift you want for HR this holiday season?

The Worst Holiday Gifts You Can Give Your Employees

It’s usually HR’s job to come up with the annual employee gift. Most companies are lame and will do the exact same thing every year. If they don’t give a turkey on Thanksgiving, they’ll definitely give out turkeys at Christmas. If they did give a turkey at Thanksgiving, you’ll likely get a ham or a fruit cake for Christmas.

Can I just say Christmas, instead of the “holiday season” or list all the possible options? My family is Jewish, but we get it, almost no company will ever recognize Chanukah, and if they do, it’s usually and insulting, “Oh, isn’t that the Jewish Christmas?!” Ugh. Most of the American workforce follows some Christian-based religion that celebrates Christmas, so it’s just easier to play along with the majority.

At some point, usually right around the pagan holiday of Halloween, someone in HR will raise the question to leadership, “Hey, what are we doing this year for ‘Christmas’ for the employees?”  What they really are asking is, “How much money are we spending per employee for some gift that looks more expensive than what it really is?”  Depending on the organization, it’s a wide range!

Here are the worst holiday gift ideas to give your employees:

  • Company Logo Portfolio – you know those fake leather bound binders with a legal pad inside. Twenty years ago those were so hot! Now, they’re sad. If you give this out as a gift you should be shot. “Oh, great, thanks, a pad of paper I can’t wait to take a picture of this and post it on my Snap making fun of the lame company I work for!”
  • Company Logo Bag – Any bag really. Duffle. Messenger. Backpack. The only time this isn’t lame is when it’s a really nice bag. Meaning the bag, minus your stupid logo, better cost at least $100 per bag. Your $12 limit per employee just makes any bag you choose, sad. Oh, it’s a Herschel bag, okay, you’re good, send me one to!
  • Any Company Logo Item Your CEO Wouldn’t Buy For Themselves – Let’s face it no one wants a crappy polo shirt, or cheap hoodie, or water bottle made in China. If your leadership team wouldn’t buy this on their own and use it, don’t buy it for your employees. If your CEO is a cheap SOB, ignore what I said above and just skip logo items altogether!
  • Any Mass Pre-packaged Food Items – You know what really sucks? Getting a gift basket of elf-sized trial-sized food items made to look gourmet that were probably made seventeen months ago.
  • A Charitable Gift in “My” Name – I love being charitable. I hate when some tries to be charitable on my behalf. You don’t know what I support! I might hate sick puppies and I don’t want money going to them. That’s not your call. My favorite charity is my kid’s college fund! Are you giving me money for that?

Employee gift giving, especially the bigger your organization is, is a tough game.  You don’t want to be cheap, but if you have 10,000 employees, that one endeavor becomes super expensive! The best thing to do is just stop it all together!

You go through one negative year of people complaining they didn’t get their lead-based painted candy corporate logo candy dish, then the next year no one remembers. Instead, let your hiring managers throw potluck lunches and have some fun. People will remember those, have more fun, and they might actually interact with each other!

 

 

The Sackett Rules for your Annual Holiday Office Party

Oh, it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas, err, office party time! And you know what that means, inappropriate behavior and awkward moments! But don’t fear, Uncle Tim is here to save you with a few simple rules.

Each year at the greatest technical recruiting company on the planet, HRU Technical Resources, we throw an annual holiday party.  They’re kind of legendary and I can neither confirm nor deny that we have our party in a bar next to a strip club. Next to, not in.

As you can imagine, we’ve had to set up some rules over the years. Feel free to use these or adapt them for your own office party:

  • The company will pay for your ride home if you’ve been drinking. Don’t use the force, that only works if you’re a Jedi and no matter how much you drank, you’re not a Jedi.
  • Don’t talk shop, unless there’s money to be made, then talk all the shop you want.
  • If you don’t show up and claim you weren’t feeling well, but you were actually at work that day, we’ll basically make up stories about the real reason you decided not to show up.
  • Attendance isn’t mandatory, please don’t come if you don’t want to come. We want to have fun and if feel you have to be there for some odd reason, you’re not fun.
  • Former employees are welcome to attend unless I hate them, then don’t have them attend.
  • Don’t corner your boss when you’re drunk and ask for a raise, unless they hit on you in an inappropriate manner, then completely ask for a giant raise.
  • Talk the newbies. It sucks bringing your spouse or significant other to a company party and then no one pays attention to you. Go out of your way to involve the new folks into your conversation and get to know them.
  • Don’t be the last to show up, or the first to leave. Wait, what?
  • Drink all you want. Remember, everyone is always watching.
  • Don’t hook up with a co-worker at the party. None of us want to see that, at least wait until you get in your Uber and give the driver a show.
  • The company will pay for your ride home. Don’t be an idiot.

Many HR leaders and pros don’t feel it’s appropriate for a company to have a party and provide alcohol. I get it. I’m good either way, you have to know your culture and what they want and be willing to set limits.

I’ve worked in giant companies and small companies and all of those companies had holiday parties with alcohol. You’ll have issues. Be prepared on how you’ll handle them. Help your employees out before they get themselves in trouble.

I always felt it was my job as an HR leader to take on that role within the business. I didn’t want my leaders being the ‘bad’ guy, so I took on that role when it was time to pull someone aside. They appreciated and they knew I wouldn’t hold a grudge on the employee who maybe went a bit too far.

Have an enjoyable holiday office party season!

 

Notes to HR Vendors #6 – Client Holiday Gift Ideas

I’ve done a few presentations titled something like, “HR Tech Buyers Guide”, “How to Buy HR Tech”, etc. The presentation is designed for HR and TA practitioners to help them become better buyers of HR Tech. To understand the crap that HR and TA Tech vendors do and say to get you to buy stuff you might not need, want, or will use.

The interesting thing about these presentations is that half the audience turns out to be the actual vendors themselves wanting to hear what it is I’m telling the real HR and TA leaders! It’s smart for the vendors. It helps make the better sellers as well. Well, at least some that actually listen!

Based on these interactions I decided to build a series of what has come out of interactions with the vendors themselves, aptly named “Notes to HR Tech Vendors”. Look I don’t alway have to be creative! Enjoy!

Notes to HR Vendors #6 – Client Holiday Gift Ideas

There two ways this post can go, 1. A post about the gifts you actually give that are awful, 2. A post about gifts you could give that people would actually enjoy. I haven’t figured out which way this one will end up, so here we go…

About this time every year I start receiving gifts in the mail from HR and TA tech vendors. Ironically enough most of the HR and TA companies I’ve highlighted on my widely popular and over-shared weekly tech review, T3, rarely send me anything, even though they share with me constantly how many sales they’ve actually made because someone read about them on this blog. But, I’m not bitter, I did it for me, not you.

The gifts I start receiving are from the vendors I’m actually paying. Makes sense. They want to keep getting paid and figure if they send me of their ‘popular’ desk calendars I’ll for sure sign up again next year to use their product or service!

It’s fashionable in the HR and TA blogging community to post pictures of the gifts we receive from vendors, thanking them for being so nice. This isn’t the real reason we post these pics. The real reason is to shove it in the nose of the other bloggers who didn’t receive the gift in a petty one-ups-manship of who’s someone better because they got a logo mug filled with stale candy and you didn’t.

I personally hate this game, but I didn’t create it, I’m just a player. Hate the game, not the player!

So, what are the best gifts you could give? It really depends on the margin business you’re in. If you’re selling background check services, you’re probably not spending much on client gifts. If you’re selling annual HRIS enterprise level software, you might be handing out Mini-Coopers for all I know.

If I was in charge of gift giving to your clients, here’s what I would suggest:

Free Consulting Service and/or Product. Here’s the thing, you know what your clients suck at, probably better than they do. Help them fix something, something they would usually pay for, but you have the expertise to solve it with little effort.

Something Personal to your Main Client Contact. I have a client who loves chocolate. I send her chocolate. I don’t send everyone chocolate, because Ted, another client, doesn’t like chocolate, but he loves craft beer. It takes a little more effort, but it means more. (Side note for HR Vendor Executives – this is also a good test to find out if your sales folks have been building relationships! If they have no clue, they have no clue!)

Development Opportunity for the individual or their team. I once had a vendor ask me to do a half-day workshop with a corporate recruiting team. It was the vendor’s gift to the client for being a great client. I had this happen with another vendor who had me come and have breakfast with a TA team and share ideas and thoughts on how they could improve. I’ve also had vendors invite me to a leadership conference on their dime.

Anything sweet that can be shared. No fruit isn’t sweet! I’m talking candy, cookies, etc. That stuff is magical, it disappears almost instantly in an office setting! Fruit get’s thrown away in about two weeks.

A great bottle of wine or spirits. If your client is a drinker, they’ll appreciate this more than you know! Most of that appreciation will come around 7pm on a Friday night, and they’ll remember you! I can tell you CareerBuilder sent me a great bottle of wine once. Many vendors have sent me bottles of Gin from all over the country. I appreciate those vendors the most!

A Note to their Boss. What!? It’s simple and cheap. A handwritten note to the executive they report to, or even above them all the way to the CEO, saying how great it is to work with a smart and caring partner, someone who is constantly trying to make your organization better, and I thought you should know.  Explain what makes them better than other peers in their field. That gift will give back in many ways!

Something they wouldn’t normally buy themselves. High-end Sunglasses, Wireless Beats, Google Home, Amazon Alexa, etc. For a hundred bucks you get a “Wow! OMG! Thanks!” You get remembered. I personally had a vendor give me a Northface jacket with their logo on it. I wear it often!

There you go from free to a few thousand dollars, all will make a statement, all will make people remember you when it comes time to budget more money for your product and services. If you want to know what won’t work, hit me up after the holidays and I’ll tell you the worst gifts I got!

 

 

 

I’m All In On Black Friday

Okay, it’s a little-known fact that I’m a big Black Friday shopper! I’m not sure the psychology of why I love Black Friday shopping, but I do. I’m sure if I sat down with a therapist it would go back to I grew up with much less than I have now, so being able to buy things at a cheaper price is exciting to me, even when I’m at a point in life where it doesn’t really make a difference.

You can take the kid out of the hood, but you can’t take the hood out of the kid.

My kids are now 20, 18 and 13. I’ve been Black Friday shopping since they were babies. I distinctly remember standing in line at Kmart in Omaha Nebraska on Thanksgiving Day (the first time Kmart ever opened on a Thanksgiving Day) to get some super cheap games of some sort that my boys were into.

They opened the doors, I, and many others ran to the back of the Kmart while yelling at the workers to find out where the games were located. I got the shelf and just grabbed as many as I could. I got home and had like three or four versions of the same game, but they were so cheap I thought we would find other parents who would need these.

I think we moved those stupid games to like the next three houses, never finding a home for them, and I’m sure they ended up at Goodwill eventually. The sad ending to a crazy moment of Black Friday shopping, that actually happened on a Thursday!

This year I’ll be going out once again on Thanksgiving eve to do some “Black Friday” shopping, even as Black Friday has seemed to jump the shark. I’m looking forward to it way more than my wife and sons! I mean now I can buy stuff I’ll never use or need for myself! Cole Haan Outlet look out, I’m coming for you!

I just told my wife last night, “did you see the prices on the TV’s? We should get one!” She, smartly, said, “we don’t need a TV”. Yeah, but, they’re practically giving them away! Come on, who doesn’t need a 60″ LED in their bedroom!? We can move the 42″ into the bathroom!

This is the crazy of Black Friday, and I’m all in! If you’re out on Black Friday – ping me on the Twitters at @TimSackett and we can share war stories!

Happy Thanksgiving, HR and TA Friends!

I’m super thankful for 2016. I have to say in 2016 I honestly believe I’ve met more HR and TA leaders and pros in this year than any other single year in my professional career!

I’m constantly told, by well-meaning folks, when I go to a new place something like, “Well, Tim, the people here are great, but from an HR (or TA) perspective, we’re probably 3-5 years behind!” Almost every single place I go! Big city, tiny country town, foreign countries, big company, small company, startups. Everyone says the same thing!

What I find is really two things:

  1. You think you’re way more behind than you actually are.
  2. Those who are actually behind, really don’t care or have given up on their profession and/or their organizations.

Those who really care about HR and TA are rarely ever behind. They might not have the same resources as other companies, but their thought processes on what is great HR and TA is spot on. Also, I rarely find HR or TA professionals or leaders who truly feel they’re on the cutting edge of innovative HR and TA practices.

The fact is, those who are on the cutting edge of HR and TA are less than 1%. If you go to HR and TA conferences you probably get to hear from these folks, and that makes you feel behind, but 99.9% of those sitting with you in the audience are right where you are! Also, just because someone is from a big, popular company, don’t think they know about HR or TA than you do!

Most of the truly great HR and TA leaders I meet aren’t from giant brands. They’re from medium to smaller organizations and they’ve had to hustle to get their shops in order, they’ve had to be innovative to compete, and they’re much more willing to push the envelope of technology to move their organizations forward.

So, today I’m giving thanks. I thankful for all the new friendships I’ve created over this past year. I’m thankful for all the old friends who call me out on my bullshit. I’m thankful for having this community of people who care so damn much about their organizations and their people. It’s uplifting to work in this world every day.

Happy Thanksgiving!

The Ultimate Gift Guide for Boss’s Day! #MakeBossesGreatAgain

Does anyone really celebrate National Boss’s Day?  It seems like something made up by some drunk employees one night and then the next day they realized it went too far!

What’s next National “White Man’s” Day? Oh wait, my black friends, women friends, Native American friends, Hillary, etc. say that’s every day! Or was that last week for Columbus Day? I get confused, they keep changing what we can and can’t celebrate.

I have to say I’ve been a ‘boss’ for (well, let’s face it I was born a ‘boss’!) twenty-some years and the only Boss’s Day gift I’ve ever gotten was being taken out to lunch back in the 90’s! Ever since then I was told it was a bad thing to be a boss. I needed to be a leader and leaders don’t get gifts, we give gifts!

I can’t enjoy being white. I can’t enjoy being male. I can’t enjoy being a boss. The struggle is real!

So, since I can’t enjoy Boss’s Day I decided to develop a list of gifts I would like to receive on Boss’s Day is we lived in let’s say Trump’s America! I’m sure part of his political platform is to Make Bosses Great Again!

The Ultimate Boss Gift Guide for Bosses Day:

Free Back Massage Coupons! Can you imagine anything more magical than giving your well-respected boss a nice good old fashioned in office back rub! Yeah, I thought so!

Liquor! Hey, this boss in-office bar doesn’t stock itself! Top shelf don’t try and drop off anything you’d find on the rail, no boss wants second tier liquor!

A nice tie! Just kidding, you should be fired if you give your boss a tie on Boss’s Day! Unless that tie comes with an invitation to tie you up! Now we’re talking boss language!

Signed copy of “Mean Business” by Chainsaw Al Dunlap!  You kids might have to look up the career of Chainsaw Al, it’s brilliant and inspiring for real bosses. Every boss loves a good bookshelf filled with books they haven’t read but one that scares the hell out of any employee who sees the titles!

Your Employee of the Month parking spot! Just kidding, again! Ha! Suckers, I park in covered parking or the driver drops me off up front. Keep your Row 1 parking spot, your 2007 Honda Civic looks really nice there.

Boss’s Day! It seems like it only comes around once a year. I’m not quite sure how that happened, you would think bosses would have made it monthly!?

So, remember today isn’t about you, it’s about your Boss! Make them feel special. Treat them with respect. Kiss the ring.