My friend, and newly named Chair of the HR Technology Conference, Steve Boese, made a comment on the back channel recently about how he was ‘looking forward’ to all the HR bloggers writing their annual posts on how employees can keep themselves out of trouble at the annual holiday office party. Let’s face it Steve – HR folks aren’t the most creative – plus, we usually stick with what got us here! (namely safe, lame posts, preaching crap everyone already knows)
But, Steve got me thinking – I wanted to do the annual office holiday party post one better and add a little spice – so I asked a few of my friends to give me their annual Office Holiday Party drink selections – and then I would analyze what this said about them and their possible career! What could go wrong!?
First up – let’s start with the idea generator himself – Steve Boese:
Drink Selection: Light Beer
What ordering Light Beer says about your career: I’m going ‘light’ because I want to give the impression I still care about my appearance, and I’m also a guy of the people. I like to fit in and nothing says ‘fittin in’ like a Light Beer. Plus, I don’t want to get to drunk, I’ve got the midnight SportsCenter DVR’d to watch when I get home.
Drink Selection: Prohibition Punch
What ordering Prohibition Punch says about your career: Please get me drunk as fast as possible because I can’t stand being around any of these people, but 3 PP’s into the night and I’ll be selecting who’s going to be taking me home tonight. Classic HR lady cocktail choice and move!
Drink Selection: Rusty Nail
What ordering a Rusty Nail says about your career: No one here is going to want to talk to me, so I better order something odd, so I have a small topic of conversation ready to go at a moments notice. The Rusty Nail also let’s everyone know you’re dangerous, like an accountant willing to go home with the drunk HR lady drinking that weird punch.
Drink Selection: Sidecar (times 20 apparently also goes with William’s order)
What ordering a Sidecar says about your career: Basically, after 20 Sidecars, you’re saying I give a shit about my career, but the owner’s wife is really hot – I mean hot enough, that I think I’m in love – I mean so f’ing hot that I’m going to propose to her tonight, right now – YOLO! By the way, which one of those people over there is the owner’s wife?
Drink Selection: Bombay Sapphire and Tonic, with a lime
What ordering this drink says about my career: I’m paying the bill and I have a personal pilates session in the morning with my life coach, Surge – and I don’t want a headache.
Drink Selection #2: Red Bull and Grey Goose
What ordering this drink says about my career: I work with young people and they were ordering it, so I wanted to look hip or cool or whatever they call it now days. Plus, I have no idea what I’m doing by ruining perfectly good Grey Goose with a mixture of Red Bull.
True Story Alert – Two Office Holiday Parties ago, at a small tucked away bar in Lansing, MI – I had 4 Red Bulls and Grey Goose. I never had, had one and some of the ‘kids’ in the office were ordering them. I played along. At 40 I turn into a pumpkin after the 11 o’clock news, so what the hell – what trouble can you get into before 11:30pm? Apparently, the ‘kids’ didn’t tell me you shouldn’t keep drinking Red Bull and Grey Goose – that’s just a starter drink, to get you going. At 3:30am I was finally able to fall asleep.
Drink Selection #3: Kamikaze shots
What ordering this drink says about my career: My office holiday party doesn’t really get started until one of the ‘kids’ begins to order Kamikaze shots. I like to get the party started, because I turned into a pumpkin around 11:30pm. Kamikaze’s seem to do the trick.
So, what drink will you be ordering at your office party this year?
P.S. – thanks to my friends for playing along!