3 Things HR Professionals Should Stop Apologizing For

Fast Company recently had an article – “3 Things Professional Women Should Stop Apologizing For“, which were:

  1. Their Financial Expectations (I.E., pay us the same!)
  2. Their Physical Appearance (I.E., Sorry we aren’t club ready – I was up with a sick kid all night!)
  3. Their Professional Accomplishments (I.E., Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean I can’t brag about what I do great!)

It’s a great article, check it out.  This got me thinking about all things we Apologize for in HR – that we should stop apologizing for – so here’s the Top 3 Things HR Pros should stop apologizing for:

1. You Getting Fired!  Oh, boy this could be #1, #2 and #3!  I can’t tell you how many HR folks I’ve trained over the past 20 years that I’ve specifically said “When you let this person go – Don’t apologize!”  I mean truly, what are you saying! “I’m sorry you are terrible at your job, or made the decision to sexually harass your co-worker – you’re fired!”  When you really think about it – it sounds funny.

2. You Not Getting Promoted.  This is almost the same as apologizing for getting fired.  Instead of apologizing to someone for not getting promoted, how about you give them a great development plan so they can actually get promoted!  Organizations can be big hairy breathing things – sometimes decisions are made and you won’t no the reasons.  HR Pros shouldn’t apologize for you not getting promoted – but they should help you navigate the political and organizational landscape.

3. You not liking your Boss, your Job, your Pay.  Ugh!  We tend to apologize for all these personal ‘happy’ choices a person makes.  The last time I checked, I never forced anyone to take a job, or forced them to accept the pay I was offering them, or forced them to work in the occupation or career they chose.  These are their own personal choices – if you don’t like it – LEAVE!  Go be happy somewhere else.  I hope that you’ll be happy here – but I can’t force you to be happy. I’ll try and give you a solid leader, with good pay and challenging work – but sometimes what I see as solid, good and challenging might not meet your expectations.  That’s when you need to make a happiness decision!

So, what should you apologize for a HR Pro?  I can think of two things that I apologize for on a regular basis: 1) Things I can Control (If I control it, and I screw it up, I need to offer you an apology); 2) Surprises!  (I might not be able to control surprises – but they suck when it comes to business and your livelihood – I apologize for surprises because in HR it’s my job to make sure those don’t happen to you as an employee).

2 thoughts on “3 Things HR Professionals Should Stop Apologizing For

  1. my manager said he was sorry after issuing my write up. when I said there’s no need to be sorry it’s my fault, he replied I can be as sorry as I want.

  2. Nobody ever apologized to me because I wasn’t engaged in my job or had a crappy boss. On the contrary, I was told it was ME.

    I think that’s the right way to do HR, akshully.

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