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Tweeting on the Job

Apr 25

For those who don’t know one of the greatest times of the year has started – the NBA Playoffs! – and being a starting member of the 8 Man Rotation – it’s my duty to post something about the NBA playoffs and tie it back to HR.  It’s what we do.  It’s what we are ‘famous’ for.  It helps us profile our audience.  So, the playoffs get started this week without one of the greatest NBA players of all time, Kobe Bryant of the Los Angeles Lakers, who was injured this season and will be out the entire playoffs.  Kobe is the Laker’s leader and because he just had surgery can’t attend the games in-person, but he did the next best thing – he live Tweeted his feedback on his teammates during the game!  As you can imagine this went over like doing a live performance review of your CEO at the annual company picnic!

I was wondering what a live tweet stream would like if your team was live tweeting during your monthly town hall all-employee meetings.  I’m guessing something like this:

ButtKisser @ButtKisser
Sitting in the front row at Town Hall – can’t wait to hear what our CEO has planned for us this month!
BrownNoser @BrownNoser
@ButtKisser running CEOs dog over to the groomer, keep me updated on what she says! Instagram a photo! #BrownNoserProbs
ZombieEE @ZombieEE
@ButtKisser sign me in at the meeting I’m with @BrownNoser taking the dog
BrownNoser @BrownNoser
@ButtKisser don’t listen to @ZombieEE he is not with me!!!!  #SlackerLoser
RunnerGurlEE @RunnerGurlEE
So upset, dumb Town Hall meeting getting in the way of my lunch 5K! YOLO – looks like 10K tonight! #RunnerLife
ButtKisser @ButtKisser
Oh, CEO is looking sharp in Nautical Navy JCrew Blazer!  #GetItStarted
BrownNoser @BrownNoser
PIC! PIC! PIC!
TheCorpHRLady @TheCorpHRLady
All EE’s – Town Hall is starting in the West Atrium – Mandatory Attendance! #Cookies!
CorpCommunications @CorpCommunications
CEO expects the month to last all month and be another month. #ThisStatementReleasedToAllStakeholdersAtSameTime
CorpLegal @CorpLegal
@CorpCommunications please delete last tweet, we can not guarantee the month will last all month.
ButtKisser @ButtKisser
CEO said we should all continue to forth great effort and good things will happen. No layoffs planned!
CorpLifer @CorpLifer
Layoffs!?  We are having layoffs!  #WTH
ZombieEE @ZombieEE
Layoffs!  This sucks…
RunnerGurlEE @RunnerGurlEE
Layoff! Timing couldn’t be better! Have 26.2 coming up – need the time! #TrainingLife
CorpCommunications @CorpCommunications
The CEO said “No Layoffs”!!!
CorpLegal @CorpLegal
@CorpCommunication please delete your last tweet we can’t guarantee we won’t have layoffs.
BrownNoser @BrownNoser
I know some folks who need to be laid off! #Zombies
ButtKisser @ButtKisser
@BrownNoser LOL! #Zombies
TheCorpHRLady @TheCorpHRLady
There are still Oatmeal Raisin cookies left! #ChocChipAllGone
Am I close?  Do you think it might go something like that.  Probably closer than we want to admit!

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