You Still Don’t Work 80 Hours Per Week!

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I have to say one of my most read posts, ever, and one that I take the most crap about is –What would it take to get you to work 80 hours per week? People actually take this post as a personal attack to their work ethic.  So, I’m here to say – I still don’t believe you!  And, now I have research to back up how you don’t really work 80 hours in a week.  From Fast Company -The Truth About How Much Workaholics Actually Work:

“A study published in the June 2011 Monthly Labor Review that compared estimated workweeks with time diaries reported that people who claimed their “usual” workweeks were longer than 75 hours were off, on average, by about 25 hours. You can guess in which direction. Those who claimed that a “usual” workweek was 65–74 hours were off by close to 20 hours. Those claiming a 55–64-hour workweek were still about 10 hours north of the truth. Subtracting these errors, you can see that most people top out at fewer than 60 work hours per week. Many professionals in so-called extreme jobs work about 45–55 hours a week. Those are numbers I can attest to from time logs I’ve seen over the years. I’ve given speeches at companies known for their sweatshop hours and had up-and-comers keep time logs for me. Their recorded weeks tend to hover around 60 hours–and that’s for focused, busy weeks with no half days, vacation days, or dentist appointments, and, most important, for weeks that people are willing to share with colleagues. We live in a competitive world, and boasting about the number of hours we work has become a way to demonstrate how devoted we are to our jobs.

That would be funny, except that numbers have consequences. If you think you’re working 80 hours per week, you’ll make different choices in your attempts to optimize them than if you know you usually work 55.”

Look – I get you work hard and you work long – but, I also get all of us think we work longer than we actually do!  It’s not an attack – it’s just the truth.  The same goes for all of you out their working 40 hours per week, when you only have about 20 hours of work – you find ways to stretch 20 hours of work into 40 hours of pay!

Ultimately, we shouldn’t be talking about hours, damn Unions!, we should be talking about results.  I don’t care if you work 10 hours or 100 hours – I, truly, only care about what you get done in that time.  We still have too many leaders who worry about hours and watch and see who leaves ‘first’ and who stays ‘late’.  The reality is – it probably has no bearing at all on their performance – and if anything, probably has a negative influence.

Results.  Set the desired result and manage to that.  If you have those not meeting the result – then you manage that issue (which might include the need to work more hours!).  I know, I know the girls from ROWE will love hearing this – and think they converted me – but they haven’t.  While I really like ROWE – it still doesn’t work for every organization.  Ugh, please don’t let Cali and Jody see this!

The Proactive Recruiting Myth

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If there is one thing that I hear more from hiring managers and executives, especially executives!, it is why can’t recruiting, as a function, be more proactive!  Both groups look at it like an economic lesson – supply and demand – like recruiting is an assembly line.  In ‘their’ world they have expected needs, and to meet those needs they will need product, so they schedule that much product to be produced and ready for delivery on the date needed.  Simple.  What is wrong with recruiting!? That’s what we want!

Simple.

Being proactive in recruiting and having a pipeline of candidates ready to go and start working isn’t simple.  You’re dealing with two parallel moving time lines – the candidates and the organizations need of that talent – it’s highly complex.  Whenever I hear about an organization that is ‘proactively’ recruiting it makes me smile – because they probably really aren’t proactively recruiting, they’re probably actually recruiting for needs they know they’ll have in the future – which is reactive, since they already know of the need.  Proactive recruiting is preparing for a need you don’t know of yet, but expect will happen.  Those are two different things.  One you have money for, one you don’t.

If you truly want your Recruiting department to do proactive recruiting, you have to be willing to ‘over-hire’ the amount of staff you actually need.  Some companies are actually willing to do this, and fund this.  But stop and think for a minute the message that sends to your organization.  You’re hiring replacements for people who haven’t left, so you’re assuming we are going to leave, crap I don’t want to be the person who gets let go, I better go out and find something!  You get people to think about leaving by being proactive.  ‘Proactive’ recruiting in this sense might actually cause higher turnover (I actually know this from experience when a highly successful organization I worked with thought this would be a brilliant idea – it wasn’t).

Now, some of you HR/Talent Pros reading this will say – but wait, what if your proactively recruiting for growth! Again – that’s not proactive, that’s reactive. If you know you’re growing, you would be hiring those folks for spots you plan on having in the future – this doesn’t cause your workforce to freak out and think they might be replaced – these people are being hired for growth.

The problem is very few HR/Talent Pros are willing to tell their hiring managers and executives the truth about Proactive Hiring.  We can do it – but – it will cost money and it might cause some folks to leave that we don’t want to leave!  Now, you can combat this – but that takes strong leaders willing to have great performance and developmental discussions with their team. There is a false assumptions by hiring managers and leaders that recruiting can somehow magically pipeline great talent for a long time.  Some organizations that a brand that can do this – but 97% don’t!  Google can pipeline candidates for months, years – folks are willing to wait in cue to get on board.  Walmart can’t. Nike can.  Bank of America can’t.

What can you do?  Share reality.  Explain why, what they want is difficult and costs a ton of money.  Then give them some other solutions, that are most cost effective.  Ways to lower turnover, ways to develop talent and ways to onboard talent faster. Also, start changing their vocabulary – Proactive – in their vernacular is the wrong word!

iTunes killed Recruiting

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There was an excellent article recently on how  iTunes singles have killed the music industry.  Buying singles hasn’t killed sales, though, in fact sales are actually up!  So, how has iTunes killed the music industry?

“When music sales reached their peak in 2000, Americans bought 943 million CD albums, and digital sales weren’t even a blip on the radar. By 2007, however, those inexpensive digital singles overtook CDs — by a wide margin — generating 819 million sales to just 500 million for the CD. Last year, there were 1.4 billion digital singles sold, dwarfing CD sales by a factor of 7. More than three-quarters of all music-related transactions were digital singles last year, according to the RIAA…

The popularity and ease of downloading cheap digital singles has transformed the industry. Not since the vinyl era has the single been this popular. The smaller, cheaper “45” record dominated music in the 1950s and ’60s, but the music industry wised up in the ’70s.Vinyl, cassette and CD singles were always cheaper for consumers, but manufacturing costs were not. Nor was the space required to house them in stores. Thus, the single became harder and harder to come by.”

In theory, we really ever never wanted an entire album/CD, for the majority of us there were always a few great songs that most listened to, but by having to buy the entire album the artist were able to work their craft. By getting music sold that wouldn’t sell if you’re just by singles, the artist is allowed to have some more freedoms to write and produce songs that might not otherwise get made, which down the road could end up being the start of something new.  Buying singles limits dare I say – diversity – of music.  The concept of only buying popular music singles is homogenizing the entire industry.  The music industry has completely changed in ten years since iTunes was launched.  Now the music industry focuses on producing hits – not music – assuming you don’t want to be one of those starving artist!

So, how has iTunes killed recruiting?

iTunes changed how we looked at something and made us want something different.  We use to want music and knew we had to ‘buy the entire package’ an artist would give us.  That included some great songs, average songs and probably some songs that were purely experiments.  iTunes is so popular many other industries try to copy the method of their success.  This philosophy spreads – “I don’t want to buy what you want to sell me – I want to buy what I want!”  Like Burger King made so popular – “I want it my way!”

Hiring has somewhat become a victim of this, especially hiring managers.  I remember a time when we would interview candidates knowing they were going to have some ‘opportunities’ and we as an organization where going to have to bring them in, give them a big hug, and teach them what they didn’t know and make them valuable to us.  Now, most organizations want to hire like they buy iTunes. They only want superstars.  When you hire a person they should have no opportunities. They should all be hit songs!  This is ruining recruiting!  Because the fact of the matter is, no one is a superstar, and everyone of us has opportunities.  By having a philosophy that you ‘only hire superstars’ you’re setting your organization and the new hire up for major failure because in short-order you’re going to find out they actually do have opportunities.  You’re going to find out, they aren’t all hit songs!

 

 

 

 

Mailbag: How Can I Get My Employees To Refer More?

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From The Project mailbag –

“Tim –

My company is doing a ton of hiring and we are trying to get our employees to refer former co-workers, friends, family, etc.  We offer a great referral bonus.  We make it easy. Still we get little, if any, referrals – and usually it’s the same people who refer candidates.  What can we do to get our employees to refer more people?

-Jennifer, Talent Acquisition Director, Austin, TX”

I love this question, because I think 99.9% of Talent and HR Pros face this same dilemma at some point in their career.  We spend a ton of time and resources putting together a great referral program – then we get the same results we got from the old referral program!  It’s frustrating. It makes us feel like our employees don’t care about the company. It makes us feel like we must not be doing something that we should.  You’re right! Well, somewhat right!

Here is my response to Jennifer:

“Jen – (It’s funny but I have a small pet peeve – if someone has a longer name with multiple syllables or one that seems formal – I like to call them by the shorter easier name. Sometimes people take offense to that. Like with ‘Jennifer’ – I like ‘Jen’ – with William – I like Will or Bill – Steven is Steve – James is Jim – you get the picture.  If you tell me “No, it’s James”, in my head I’m thinking “No, it’s asshole!” Anywho…back to Jen!)

Everything with your program is fine. Sure you can make tweaks and add technology, etc.  But basically referral programs don’t work because Talent Acquisition does two things wrong:

1. You’re asking the wrong question.  Almost every HR shop wants their employee to refer more candidates – and they will ask “Who do you know that is looking?”  The reply, almost 100% of the time – “No.”  Instead, ask this one question, then have your recruiters shut up and write down what they say: “Tell me the name of one of your previous co-workers from your last company.”  That’s it.  Each name is a referral.  You can tweak it for certain companies you want to pull from and focus the question to those current employees who came from those companies.  It works.   

2. You Don’t Ask Face-to-face.  Employees can blow off email easier than anything. Stop sending email and even calling them.  Get your lazy butt off your chair and have your recruiters sit down face-to-face when they ask this question. 

This change, to how you go about getting Employee Referrals, forces your recruiters to actually recruit – which is why 99% of companies don’t do this on the corporate side of Talent Acquisition!  If all you get is a name and a place of employment – your recruiters will have to Google a phone number and call into a company to speak to the person – they also might be able to find the person on social networks and track them down that way, but it’s faster to just call them at work.  People LOVE being called about a job opportunity!  It’s flattering. You found them – they don’t know how – they must be doing something right!  

Let me know how this works!

Tim”

I hope Jen tries this with her team, but I don’t hold out hope.  People say they want more of something – you tell them how to get it – and they reply with “Oh, I didn’t want to do that”.  Oh, so you were looking for magical unicorns to give you more referrals – my bad – yeah, those work to, magical unicorns are great for referrals!  What people really are saying is “How can I get more referrals without doing anything to get them?”  My answer to that question would be different from what I told Jen above – that answer is:  “Nothing”.

 

 

 

 

A Car Ride To Laramie

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There are times in your life you’ll never forget.  Take a moment and think about your past.  What comes to mind?  It’s funny how we can recall some very important moments – graduating, getting married, birth of a child, etc., but we also recall some very, for what it seems now, insignificant moments as well.  I thought of one recently – and I was able to recall it like it was yesterday.  In the summer of 1988 I made a decision to forgo an academic scholarship at Western Michigan University and drive 1200 miles to attend the University of Wyoming.  I never went and visited UW, and being that it was 1988 – I couldn’t even have looked it up on the internet.  I had a friend who was there and the extent of the conversation was “hey, they have a men’s volleyball team here – come out and play”.

I packed up my 1979 Ford Mustang and set out with an atlas of the United States my father had given me.  It was August and hot, and my car had no air conditioning and an 8 track tape player.  I bought a cassette tape adapter, filled up the tank with everything an 18 year old had to there name and drove west.  Here’s the exact moment I remember –

I’m driving across western Illinois on I80 – it’s basically truck stops and corn fields.  The sun is shining hot, the windows are down and the music was loud (because of how loud the wind noise was driving down the highway with your windows down).  I had this feeling of hope like I had never felt before.  Of wonderment.  An energy that you only feel when starting something new.  It was a feeling of – I’m starting my life.  For the first time – the life I would be living would be mine – and it was glorious.

It’s not a memory most of us get to have frequently.  Usually once – then real life comes along and kicks you in the ass at some point (Dad forgot to mention that part as he handed me a cooler of cold drinks on my way out of Grand Rapids!).

Starting something new.

Think about that the next time you’re trying to figure out how to get something launched or start something over within your organization.  Starting is where the fun happens – not where the work begins.  Starting is where you still have hope.  Where everything is positive.  When your energy level will be highest.  Don’t waste the start.  Relish in it – make it last – don’t discount it. Crazy how a simple car ride to Laramie can mean so much.

 

SHRM Conference Rejection #2

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I got a SHRM Strategy Conference rejection letter last week.  Some of you might remember the last rejection I got from SHRM – if not – here’s the post on FOT – SHRM Doesn’t Like Us – But You Should.   Here’s the email from rejection #2:

SHRM rejection 2
Here’s what I wish Letty would have done instead:

Dear Tim,

Thank you for submitting a presentation proposal….blah, blah, blah.

I either liked it or didn’t like, it doesn’t matter  – we didn’t select it.  We didn’t select it because: (followed by 3 actual reasons)

1. The content didn’t fit what we wanted to do – next time try….

2. It’s been done before a thousands times – next time try…

3.  You have no idea what you’re talking about, etc., etc., etc.

Please try again next time – if you want some pointers catch me at the next conference and we can have a cup a coffee.

Letty

There’s no doubt Letty is smart – George Washington MBA grad – actually worked at a staffing company (you would think Letty would have a kinship with me!), long time SHRM employee.  I’ve been a SHRM SPHR holder and member since 2001 – and I keep hearing how they want ‘fresh blood’ and ‘new ideas’ and, yet, every SHRM conference I attend I see the same content, same faces presenting, same SHRM.  I’ve actually seen a presentation from a guy at SHRM national who has been doing the same presentation for the last 10 years – he just changes the dates on the first slide!   I wanted to shoot myself.  But I stayed and he gave me these tips for getting accepted by Letty and the SHRM crew:

1. Sell out.  Go completely old school HR – FMLA is exciting, OHSA rocks, I have 4 cats.

2. Make a title that sounds so boring you fall asleep actually making it – but make sure to use words like: Strategic, Influence and Results.

3. Don’t say anything slightly controversial in your bio or presentation description – don’t piss off the powers that be.

Sorry, crew – I won’t do it.  Truth be told Kris Dunn and I actually did follow these rules for the 2012 SHRM national show and got accepted – but then did the presentation the way we wanted to just using SHRM’s boring title slide.  It was well attended, we got great feedback and got strong survey numbers – and – we didn’t get invited back this year.

Letty, Letty, Letty – it’s O.K. – I don’t bite, really!  I’m a former headhunter like you, our kind needs to stick together!

Ugh – this just sounds like sour grapes.  I give up on trying to help SHRM.

A Diversity Plan Even White People Can Live With!

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When was the last time you went to a crowded beach or park, or even went to an outdoor concert where you had to sit on the grass?  I can bet you did something – because everyone does this.  You set up a perimeter didn’t you? A what?! A perimeter. You put down your blanket, maybe an umbrella, some chairs, etc.  You made sure you carved out ‘your’ space, in a public space that is open to everyone.  Hell, let’s face it – if you would have had portable fencing you would have put that up as well.  Humans like to collect, build and attempt to keep all of it.  It’s why the Great Wall of China was built.  It’s why we have a silly fence up between the U.S. and Mexico.  It’s why you have a 6 foot high fence up around your 40 foot by 40 foot backyard in the suburbs.  You’re protecting ‘your’ space.

Diversity is about breaking down those walls, those barriers, so it stands to reason that those barriers that are being broken down are going to cause some folks to be uncomfortable.  In 99.9% of the cases in today’s work world – those folks are white people – and to slice it even further – white men.  Let me give you an example so we can discuss:

Let’s say you work in a company with 100 employees and 88% of those employees are white.  Now HR comes out and says “we value Diversity” (not sure who the ‘we’ is, but we’ll assume our white leadership team who live in the $750K homes and their kids go to schools with zero diversity), and we are going to do a bunch of ‘stuff’ to increase the diversity of our workforce.  Here’s what the 88% hear.  “You 88 white people aren’t good enough.  We need to get rid of some of you and bring in minorities because they can do it better.”  Which might be true.

Remember your blanket in the park?  Someone just sat their chair down in the middle of your white work forces blanket. That isn’t a good feeling.  (It’s uncomfortable for you to hear/read ‘white work force’ isn’t it? Most people who write about diversity/inclusion will use ‘majority’ and ‘minority’ because it puts it in less black and white terms – makes it easier to accept.)

Most organizations and HR shops struggle to do Diversity and Inclusion successfully in their organizations because they are unwilling to recognize this simple reality and address it.   Oh, believe me I hear you right now!  “Tim – diversity and inclusion isn’t about color – it’s about thoughts and ideas!” Then you my friend don’t get the reality of 90% of the organizations out there today.  For most it is still about faces – shouldn’t be – but it is.  To be successful – we have to move beyond that.  So, how do you do that?

There isn’t a perfect solution.  A silver bullet.  But I do know one way that has helped some organizations – but it might give you (HR and leadership) some answers that will be hard for to live with!  Data.  Data doesn’t lie.  It just gives you the truth.  If you ‘truly’ want better performance – through data, find the exact makeup of the highest performing groups and teams in your organization, industry, competitors, etc.  Here’s the catch – data might show you that your 100% all white guy sales team isn’t the most effective.  You might find that the makeup should be 90% 24 year old Asian females and 10% middle age Hispanic males.  You also might find that 100% white guy is the best.  Data will give you truth – most organizations don’t want the truth.  Most HR shops don’t want the truth.  They want to take your 88% white and turn it into 75% white because ‘feels’ better.

I’m not saying your white employees will like to hear that they are all getting let go so you can bring in your all female Asian team, but at least there is a reason based on data – not feelings.  HR and leadership have been sold a false premise that Diversity and Inclusion is good for all.  It makes you better.  And so we march forward like lemmings off a cliff, not questioning the truth.  The truth is – diversity and inclusion might be great for your organization.  The truth is – it also might be disastrous for your organization.  Do the research.  Stop reading USA Today articles.  Figure out what is actually best for your organization.  Don’t blindly follow anything, just because everyone else is doing it.  There is a ‘right’ answer out their for your organization, and you might be surprised at what that answer is.

5 Things That Make Great HR Partners Great!

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I use to think the title ‘HR Partner’ was played out – and it probably was for a time.  There was a point a few years ago when every HR Pro had to change their title from HR Manager, HR Director, etc., to HR Partner.  It always made me feel like we were all apart of a bad cowboy movie – ‘Giddy up, Partner!’  I’ve actually grown to really like the “Partner” in the title of an HR Professional.  While many HR Pros just changed their title, I’ve met some great ‘Partners’ in HR who have changed their game, to match their title change.

What makes a Great HR Partner Great?  Here are 5 things I think makes them game changers:

1. Great HR Partners know your business.  Now wait.  I didn’t say they ‘knew their own business’ – they know the business of who they support. But wait, there’s more!  They know the business of who they support, the way the person or team they support knows it. Say what?!  It’s not good enough to know the business of your organization.  You have to know how those you support know and support the business. That could be different, based on the leader.  One leader might be ultra conservative in their business practices, another risky. A great HR Partner knows how to support them in the way those they support, want to be supported – while still being able to do the HR part of their job.

2.  Great HR Partners have short-term memory. Great baseball pitchers don’t remember one pitch to the next.  Each pitch is new. Each pitch has potential for success.  If they remembered each pitch, the last one, that was hit for a home run, would cloud their judgement about the next pitch.  Great HR Partners are willing to change their mind and try new things.  They don’t carry around their experiences like a suitcase, pulling them out and throwing them on the table each time those they support want to try something new.  Don’t forget about your failures, but also don’t let your failures stop you from trying again.

3. Great HR Partners allow risk.  A great HR Partner is able and willing to accept that organizations have risk.  It is not the job of HR to eliminate risk, it is the job of HR to advise of risk, then find ways to help those they support, their partners, to achieve the optimal results in spite of those risks.  Far too many HR Partners attempt to eliminate risk and become the ‘No’ police.  Great HR Partners know when to say “No” and when to say “Yes”.

4. Great HR Partners don’t pass blame.  If you are a great HR partner and you work with great partners, you will all support each other in the decision making process.  A great HR Partner will never pass blame, but will accept their share as being one of those who supported the decision to move forward.  This doesn’t mean you become a doormat.  Behind closed doors, with your partners, you hash out what there is to hash out.  When the doors open – all partners support the final decision that is made.  A Great HR Partner will have the influence to ensure they can, and will, support that decision when those doors open up.

5. Great HR Partners don’t wait to be asked.  A great partner in any capacity is going to support those they support with every skill they have available to them.  In HR we have people skills – so when those who we support have issues, we offer up our ideas on what we can do to help the team.  Great HR Partners don’t stop at HR advice!  In a time of brainstorming and problem solving the idea that goes unshared, is the worst kind of idea.  I might not know operations, and I will say that up front, but I’m going to put myself out there and tell my partners that eliminating the rubber grommets on bottom of the widget is a bad idea, because while it saves us $.13 per unit, it also makes our product slide around and that ultimately will piss off the customer.

Being an ‘HR Partner’ has very little to do with HR.  Those you support expect you have the HR expertise – what they don’t expect is how great of a ‘partner’ you can be.  Great HR Partners focus on the partnership, not on the HR.

The Project Mail Bag

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One of the great by products of writing an HR blog is I get people contacting me who now believe I know what I’m talking about, when it comes to HR topics.  Before I started writing – I was an idiot in HR who didn’t know anything. After you write for a while I’ve become a ‘Subject Matter Expert’ – so people ask me stuff.  It’s funny how that works!  Its like going to work for a really cool company – everyone wants to hear you speak.  A year ago I was at ABC Dog Food Co. and now conference in America would accept me to speak.  Now I have a job at Google – and people are calling me begging me to speak and offering to pay me!  Same person, same knowledge – now with new branding!?

The questions coming from readers are cool – because I feel the pain from the HR and Talent Pros who pose them.  I’ve been there – I have a least one or two things they can try – many times we end up going back and forth and coming up with something neither one of us thought of!  I wanted to share some of those questions and interactions – because quite frankly most are better than anything I could write to begin with.

Question:

From Mary – HR Pro in Eastern Pennsylvania, at a mid-sized Manufacturing company –

“Dear Tim (starts off like a Casey Kasem long distance dedication doesn’t it!) –

I can’t stand the people I work with in HR.  We have a small team – 5 people – who have all been here for at least 3 years – and they don’t want to change anything.  I just graduated with my degree in HR and couldn’t wait to get started – and now I feel like I’ve made the wrong career choice. How can I get the HR team to try new things!?”

My response:

“Dear Mary (she started it!) –

Quit.  Send your resume to Google – I hear great things about their HR program, apparently, they do HR way different than everyone else.  Kidding – don’t quit!

People only change when they are forced to (which you don’t have authority) or they see ‘major’ benefit in it for themselves.  So you have to find one of these two ways to entice your team to want to try new things.  First way (assuming one road block is your actual leader in HR) – make friends outside of HR and find their pain points, things they need better or changed.  In most organizations – those outside of HR have more influence – getting them pushing for change, will force HR to react.  Since you’ll be shaping that from outside of HR – you can start to drive the change you want to see inside of HR.   Your HR peers will see you trying to talk with those outside your HR Departments locked doors – be vigilant – don’t let them stop you – make friends outside of HR!  Second way – come up with ideas that make your HR peers look really smart, helpful and at the same time they get to do less work.  This is harder!  But if you are willing to give credit to them, for your ideas, you might trick them into changing some stuff.  Be sneaky good.

You are not going to change the culture within your HR team.  Culture always wins.  You are new.  Within 6 months – you’ll think the exact same way they do, unless you do stuff really different – without embarrassing them, or pissing them off.  Manage up to your HR leader.  Stay positive and helpful.  Keep a constant pressure on moving your ideas forward in ways that doesn’t cost your team to do more work, or cost more resources.

If that fails – join Google.

T.”

 

Tweeting on the Job

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For those who don’t know one of the greatest times of the year has started – the NBA Playoffs! – and being a starting member of the 8 Man Rotation – it’s my duty to post something about the NBA playoffs and tie it back to HR.  It’s what we do.  It’s what we are ‘famous’ for.  It helps us profile our audience.  So, the playoffs get started this week without one of the greatest NBA players of all time, Kobe Bryant of the Los Angeles Lakers, who was injured this season and will be out the entire playoffs.  Kobe is the Laker’s leader and because he just had surgery can’t attend the games in-person, but he did the next best thing – he live Tweeted his feedback on his teammates during the game!  As you can imagine this went over like doing a live performance review of your CEO at the annual company picnic!

I was wondering what a live tweet stream would like if your team was live tweeting during your monthly town hall all-employee meetings.  I’m guessing something like this:

ButtKisser @ButtKisser
Sitting in the front row at Town Hall – can’t wait to hear what our CEO has planned for us this month!
BrownNoser @BrownNoser
@ButtKisser running CEOs dog over to the groomer, keep me updated on what she says! Instagram a photo! #BrownNoserProbs
ZombieEE @ZombieEE
@ButtKisser sign me in at the meeting I’m with @BrownNoser taking the dog
BrownNoser @BrownNoser
@ButtKisser don’t listen to @ZombieEE he is not with me!!!!  #SlackerLoser
RunnerGurlEE @RunnerGurlEE
So upset, dumb Town Hall meeting getting in the way of my lunch 5K! YOLO – looks like 10K tonight! #RunnerLife
ButtKisser @ButtKisser
Oh, CEO is looking sharp in Nautical Navy JCrew Blazer!  #GetItStarted
BrownNoser @BrownNoser
PIC! PIC! PIC!
TheCorpHRLady @TheCorpHRLady
All EE’s – Town Hall is starting in the West Atrium – Mandatory Attendance! #Cookies!
CorpCommunications @CorpCommunications
CEO expects the month to last all month and be another month. #ThisStatementReleasedToAllStakeholdersAtSameTime
CorpLegal @CorpLegal
@CorpCommunications please delete last tweet, we can not guarantee the month will last all month.
ButtKisser @ButtKisser
CEO said we should all continue to forth great effort and good things will happen. No layoffs planned!
CorpLifer @CorpLifer
Layoffs!?  We are having layoffs!  #WTH
ZombieEE @ZombieEE
Layoffs!  This sucks…
RunnerGurlEE @RunnerGurlEE
Layoff! Timing couldn’t be better! Have 26.2 coming up – need the time! #TrainingLife
CorpCommunications @CorpCommunications
The CEO said “No Layoffs”!!!
CorpLegal @CorpLegal
@CorpCommunication please delete your last tweet we can’t guarantee we won’t have layoffs.
BrownNoser @BrownNoser
I know some folks who need to be laid off! #Zombies
ButtKisser @ButtKisser
@BrownNoser LOL! #Zombies
TheCorpHRLady @TheCorpHRLady
There are still Oatmeal Raisin cookies left! #ChocChipAllGone
Am I close?  Do you think it might go something like that.  Probably closer than we want to admit!