Category Archives: Benefits

How many hours of work are too many?

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An article out last week on NFL.com spoke to the Detroit Lions head coach’s, Jim Schwartz, work schedule which averages 100 hours per week!  That’s break that down:

– 7 days * 24 hours = 168 total hours in a week

– 100 work week / 7 days = 14.2 hours per day

What does a 14 hour day look like?  You get into the office at 6 or 7am and you don’t get home until 8, 9, 10pm.  Every day, every week.  I know what you’re thinking.  Well they only play 20 games.  He gets half a year off!  Plus, he makes millions of dollars.  First, NFL never stops working.  Off season might be busier than the actual season.

Why do so many of these coaches work 100 hour weeks? From the article:

“The mentality of most coaches borders on the paranoid-obsessive end of the spectrum. Good coaches care about the littlest details. It takes time to wade through film, meet with coaches and players, script practices, design game plans and perform the oodles of other responsibilities that need to be perfect…

“We’re here a ton, but then I go up and I talk to a coach about anything and I’m sitting in his office and I peek down and glance underneath his desk, and there’s a pillow and a blanket,” Lions wide receiver Nate Burleson said. “For a brief moment, I laugh and I’m like, ‘Holy smokes, this guy sleeps in his office.’ But then when you really think about it, it’s like, ‘This guy really sleeps in his office.'”

It begs the question, should the NFL or any employer put a limit on the amount of hours that a person can work?  Airlines do it for their pilots and flight crew.  Safety is paramount and the last thing you want is a pilot that has not slept for 18-24 hours.  Many other occupations do it for similar reasons.  Safety always seems to be the one factor in limiting work hours.  Is the NFL not concerned about the safety and health of their coaches?  They limit the amount of practice time for their players.

How many  of us wish we had employees who loved what they did so much they wanted to work 100 hours per week!?

BambooHR’s founders limit their entire staff to 40 hours per week.  They kick them out if they try to work more.  That seems a bit radical.  I’m sure my staff would love me doing that to them, but 40 hours in most workplace environments seems to be the minimum, not the maximum.

I’m not even focusing on whether the hours in the ‘office’ or at home.  Just total work hours.  How many hours are too many?  Hit me in the comments.  My feeling is there are times in every occupation when more or less hours are needed to do a great job at whatever it is you’re doing.  One week I can be a rock star 40 hours.  The next week I might look like a total slack for working 60 hours.  I’m a big proponent of work when you need to.  The old farmers saying of ‘there are times to make hay’, runs true in every organization.  If you have someone who is consistently, over long periods of time, working 60+ hours, you’ve got a staffing problem.

 

Are You An Employee Friendly Company?

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If you were to ask any HR Pro or Executive from any company if they were ’employee friendly’ I can guarantee you 100% of the time, their answer would be ‘Yes’!

But are you really?

I’m sure you would point to your some of your policies to demonstrate to me how employee friendly you are.  You would show me your policy on flexible work arrangements or your personal time off (PTO) policy, maybe even your anniversary policy.  These would prove to me that your truly are employee friendly.

What I wouldn’t see would be policies that aren’t so employee friendly.  Like the policy of only allowing lunch to be reimbursed when traveling if you were with a client (you have to eat lunch when you’re in the office and we don’t pay, this is no different!). The policy that forces someone traveling for the day to come into the office if they get back before 5pm, even thought they left on a Sunday to get to the client location. The policy that forces you to use your PTO when you decide to stay home during a snow storm, instead of trying to make it in to work in dangerous driving conditions. The policy requiring you to ‘sign out’ a laptop to take home to do work at home. The policy requiring a ‘doctor’s note’ when you stay home sick (just what our healthcare system needs, employees coming in with colds).

The reality is, most policies are written in the best interest of the employer.  It’s the employer who writes them, so we can assume that they’ll weighted to ensuring the employer is protected, first and foremost.  Put it this way, we have way too much tax policy/code in our country.  Do you think that is in place to protect you, the individual, or the government and/or the companies that pay billions of dollars to lobby for company friendly tax code?   Companies don’t top being companies when they start writing employment policies.

Employee friendly companies usually have one very common thing — they have few policies.  Treat people like adults.  Do what’s best for all stake holders, employees, shareholders and customers.  Don’t put up with idiots who try and take advantage of your awesome employee friendly policies! That’s the real issue, right?  We have policies because of the 5%.  Hey, one time we had this guy and stole a laptop he used to take home for work.  So, now we have a policy to make sure that never happens again.  If we told people they would get paid if they stayed home when it snowed, people would stay home when there was 1 inch!

If you manage ‘the exception’ through policy, you’re really good at bad HR.  You are not employee friendly.  I blame unions for most unfriendly employee policies, because unions will take everything to the letter of anything written (and I like to blame unions for the downfall of American manufacturing, the economy and Santa Claus not bringing me presents once I turned 13).  Common sense is thrown out the door.  You said in paragraph two that employees should use their judgement when coming in if they feel road conditions are dangerous, and Mr. Smith felt like 1 inch of snow is dangerous, so you can’t fire him and you have to pay him.  Mr. Smith stayed home because of bad road conditions 27 times in the past 3 months.

So, are you employee friendly?

A New Way To Retain Employees!

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(I just returned from the 2013 HR Technology Conference where I got to see all the latest and greatest HR technology, and speak to some wickedly smart people.  So, for the next week or so, my plan is to share some of the products and insights I gained from this experience. So we are clear, no companies I write about have paid me to write about them.  I requested Diet Mt. Dew be delivered and no one brought one.  Enjoy…)

I swear last product I want to talk about from HR Tech!  This one is near and dear to my heart because it’s about employee retention!  I know boring right!  No sexy, stealthy way to find talent or Jedi Mind Tricks to get your staff to perform better, just good old solid how the hell do we keep our people from leaving!  HR to it’s core.

The company is BlackBookHR, there new product is called Sense and it won best new HR Tech product of 2013!  I continually referenced them as BackDoorHR (because deep down I’m a 12 yaer old boy at heart).  I’m sorry about that Chris Ostoich, the Founder and CEO of BlackBookHR.  Chris is a really great person, with a really great story.  He’s one of those guys you route for. He couldn’t really even afford to have a booth at HR Tech, but won the prize for best product anyway! (He told me he could afford a booth, but thought there were better ways to spend the money – he’s right!)  Also, he brought his Mom out to Vegas to see him get the award!  Pure Midwest, baby!

Sense is a software which sets an engagement baseline for your entire staff.  Don’t worry that takes about 5 minutes for your employees to complete.  Then, each week Sense goes out and within 30 seconds re-measures to the baseline of each employee (through an email interface and quick point and select questions).

Here’s a quick example: An original question might be — “My company gives me the tools and resources I need to do great work?”  On a scale of 1 to 10 I say, “Yep, they do at an 8”.  Everything is going great at an 8, then a few months later my boss tells me he’s cutting some tool out of my budget I rely on.  That Friday Sense asks me the same “tools and resource” question, but this time I answer “1”.  The system ‘senses’ something went wrong with my engagement, and that I could be a flight risk, so HR is told.  HR then determines how to elevate this to my supervisor, or do they handle it themselves. Pretty cool!

Sense also does one other very cool thing and shows you how an employee influences within your organization.  Not all employees are created equal.  Some have major influence and connections, and one of those employees leaves, usually others follow.  Sense will show you who those employees are in your organization as well!

Beyond cool, is that some very big Fortune 500 types have been using this and the metrics show that it actually works.  Like reducing many percentage points off your turnover works!

How did Chris know this idea would work?  He lived it!

Chris isn’t from HR or even from IT.  He was a finance dude who had a feeling he could easily be talked into leaving his current company.  He saw others like him, and thought there is a way to stay connected and at least giving the company a chance to hang on to him, and show him some love, on those times when he was most vulnerable to leaving.  Long story short, he shared his idea with his company, and they listened, and they told him to get his ass back to work!   He did, on his own, building Sense!

Check it out – quickly!  Sometimes the simplest ideas and products have the biggest impact to our bottom line.   I have a feeling Sense won’t be around as a stand alone product for long.  My guess is Oracle, SumTotal, Halogen, SuccessFactors, etc. will come knocking on Chris’s door and offer him a huge pile of cash to integrate it into their own suite.  It’s that good.

Cool New HR Tech…that you might even be able to afford

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(I just returned from the 2013 HR Technology Conference where I got to see all the latest and greatest HR technology, and speak to some wickedly smart people.  So, for the next week or so, my plan is to share some of the products and insights I gained from this experience. So we are clear, no companies I write about have paid me to write about them. Enjoy…)

Here’s a run down from the HR Tech Conference Expo:

BambooHR: Tagged as your “1st HR system” or “we love you, if you use spreadsheets as your HR system” – Ben Peterson, the CEO, was by far the coolest and nicest and real CEO (and maybe person) I met all week at HR Tech.  They don’t like to use ‘HRIS’ because small and medium sized businesses and HR shops don’t even really know what that means.  BambooHR is an easy to use HR system and nicely designed, for a very, very cheap price.  Don’t let the price scare you off — cheap, in this case, doesn’t mean they try and a one-size and process fits all perspective down your throat – they’ll customize for you – and still be cheap!  If you are looking for your first HR system, or to up grade your old system, and you don’t look at these guys, you should be fired as an HR professional.

Blissbook: “Employee Handbooks to Smile About”.  I know, I know — Tim, you’re talking handbooks!?  Here’s the deal.  They have a super cheap, super cool UI (user interface — BTW, no one at HR Tech talks English, they only talk tech).  So, you can put your handbook online and add video, and hyperlinks and all kinds of stuff, and they make it really easy.  Don’t think PDF of your handbook on your careers site, it’s more than that.  Think of it as a cultural narrative of your organization having it’s own website.  One issue I see them having, the examples they show are really cool and hip.  So you think you can do the same thing, the problem is content isn’t easy to write to be cool and hip.  If you aren’t creative, neither will your Blissbook.

SumTotal: SumTotal is like BambooHR, if BambooHR was a gigantic enterprise total HR solution for your business.  Let’s be clear, SumTotal is a big company, like Oracle, ADP, SuccessFactors, etc. Big companies have the resources to do some really cool things, and Sum Total did that this year.  They added the industry’s first Context-Aware user experience. What’s Context-Aware?  You know when you go online to a store and look at a really nice pair of shoes you want, you put it in the cart, but last second you decide, I just can’t get these today.  We all do it.  Context-Aware marketing is the Ad a few days later on the side of another site you’re reading where those exact same shoes you were looking at pops up and now are 10% off!  How does this work in an HR system? Let’s say you have an employee who is not reaching their sales goal.  SumTotal’s new addition will recognize the employee is missing their goal, and without prompting or any HR or manager interaction at all recommend a training course for this person to take to better help them make their goals and maybe even a mentor in the company they should speak with who could help them become better at their job.  I don’t do this justice — trust me, it was super cool!

Work4Labs:  Work4 does Facebook recruiting, in an industry where no one has really figured it out yet (do you hear that Facebook?).  Work4 makes an solution that makes it really easy for companies to get their jobs posted on their company Facebook page and help them navigate, very easily, how to search for talent on Facebook’s Graph Search.  Also, they do this for a rather cheap price!  (Cheap meaning the cost of one or two headhunting fees, so you can see a very quick ROI)  Matthew Brown, Head of Product and co-Founder, might be 24 years old, which also helps let you know these guys get Facebook!

WePow: Formerly known as Wowser.  WePow is a video interviewing platform.  They’re really good at branding.  They gave out royal blue Converse Chuck Taylors at their booth and had pairs for all the big name pundits in our industry: Kris Dunn, Steve Boese, Gerry Chrispin, John Sumser, William Tincup, Laurie Ruettimann, etc.  Those kinds of things make a splash and get a good buzz going about their product.  Apparently, I’m not a big name in the industry, I didn’t get a pair of shoes (which is really the only reason they get mentioned here!).  Also, apparently, they are “like HireVue” when I asked their booth crew what they did.  Thanks HireVue for being so good at marketing you now have become the Kleenex of video interviewing.

YouEarnedIt:  New up and coming awards and recognition firm, designed around delivering a product that small and medium sized businesses can use.  Think Achievers, for smaller companies, and a lot less money.  Much more accessible for smaller companies because you aren’t forced to purchase their catalog of merchandise/awards which usually carry an industry standard 20% markup.  They do have that as well, but much more cost effective than the giants in the industry.

More next week – I’ve got two companies – one really well known and one hardly anyone knows doing some really cool things!

Reality sucks – Most Employees are Dumb!

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We are at a watershed moment in the history of employee healthcare in the United States.  As Obamacare gets ready to go live on October 1st, many company are making moves to move their normal company sponsored to private healthcare exchanges.  What’s a private healthcare exchange, you ask?  In a nut shell it’s very similar to a 401K offering, but for health insurance.  Basically, your company will give you an amount of cash, usually similar to what they pay normally for your healthcare, and they make you make the decision of what health insurance you want to buy.  Don’t panic, you don’t have to do this on your own.  Insurance companies have figured out how to best take advantage of you and keep within the Obamacare rules.

Your companies HR/Benefit Pros will bring in an insurance company they contract with to ‘administer’ your private healthcare exchange, which mimics in many ways the Obamacare public healthcare exchange.  You will be given many options.  Might be 5, might be 10, it’s all up to the insurance company and your HR team.  Insurance options will run a wide spectrum of options.  There might be great low cost plans for young singles.  Plans designed for families with children, and even plans for older workers.  All kinds of options and plans.  Exactly what President Obama believes you want — Choice.

This will be a disaster for many people, because most people are dumb when it comes to insurance.  Also, these plans will more than likely cost you more money.  Companies are going this route for a reason, healthcare exchanges take them out of the healthcare business.  You will now be responsible for managing your health insurance, not your HR department.  I’m sorry, you choose a plan that was cheap because you never go to the doctor and now you’re very sick — it was nice knowing you.

You see one thing Benefit Pros did in your organization was ensure you couldn’t be stupid!  They designed plans that wouldn’t allow you to make stupid choices.  Basically, they were acting like your Mom.  Now your Mom, is you.

Check out this audio cast from Money Talks at Time.com — it’s outstanding in breaking down a very complex issue in a few minutes.

I don’t want to call employees dumb, but data shows when it comes to health insurance and options, you’re dumb.

Just as you are in picking your 401K options.  Give you too many choices, and you make bad, emotional decisions.  It doesn’t matter if we are talking about your financial future, or your healthcare future, emotion has no place in the discussion.  There’s a reason most industrialized companies in the world have a single-payer national healthcare system — people are dumb.  Also, when given the chance companies will find a way to take your money from you, when you’re dumb.  Insurance companies aren’t going out of business, and they’ll continue to ‘donate’ heavily to political campaigns.  Choice isn’t a bad thing, uninformed choice is.  Be careful my friends, change is coming.

Fillin’ Buckets

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Earlier this week my youngest son got to lead a small part of an assembly for the third and fourth grade classes at his school.  He was really excited about his part, he got to get up in front of everyone at the end and kind of lead a cheer — you know kids love being loud at school!  I asked him what the assembly was about, and he said, “fillin’ buckets”.  “What?”, was my reply.  He said, “you know, you can say some things that will fill someone’s bucket, or you can say some things that will empty their bucket.”  My reply, “Oh, you mean like making deposits into someone’s emotional bank account.” His reply back,  “No, filling buckets, it has nothing to do with banks.”

Fillin’ Buckets. Simple, yet hard.

Today, I want to make it easy for you to do two things: 1. Fill your own bucket; 2. Fill some buckets.

Here’s a list of things that will help:

1. Surround yourself with positive people. Even if it’s only one person.  Even if it’s only yourself.

2. Connect at a deeper level.  Anyone can talk about the weather or what TV show they watched last night.  Strive to go deeper.

3. Hug someone who doesn’t expect it.

4. Spend a little money on someone else.

5. Take 5 minutes to appreciate all that you have.

6. Eat lunch or dinner outside.

7. Tell one person, you don’t normally talk to, one positive, genuine thing about why you like what they do.

8. Unplug and listen.

One last tip.  Leaders, as many of you are that read this, tend to be bucket fillers, because it’s part of the ‘job’.  Great leaders are genuine in this, but it’s harder than it looks, because many times our employees feel like we might just be doing this because it’s part of our role.  Catch 22.  How do you combat this?  Fill the buckets of those above you.  Leaders rarely get their buckets filled.  Try it, you’ll be amazed at how it makes you feel.  There’s something remarkable that happens when you start filling buckets, you realize it doesn’t matter who it is that you’re filling, it feels good!

What am I doing today?  I’m fillin’ buckets!

 

$43/hr Fast Food Worker!

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There is this new, hip burger joint in Detroit metro called Moo Cluck Moo (alright, it’s a SmashBurger knock-off) which is becoming famous for paying it’s workers a minimum of $15/hr.  Okay, it’s not $43/hr, but the title was to prove a point and ask a question.  If you haven’t eaten at one of these new burger joints – they’re great! I mean great if you love a great burger, fries and shake and a ‘fast food’ meal bill of $50 for a family of four!  BTW – the sweet potato fries at SmashBurger will be on my death row menu.

How much should a fast food worker be paid?

Is $15/hr really a living wage?

$15/hr equates to about $30,000 before taxes.  Take out taxes,  health insurance co-pays, etc., and for arguments sake, let’s say that $30,000 is now $22,000.  $22,000 is fairly realistic, right?

So, $22,000 is about $1800 per month.  Let’s break down the expenses:

Crappy Apartment – $600/month

Crappy car payment – $250/month

Crappy car gas – $200/month

Crappy car insurance – $100/month

iPhone 5 – $100/month (you know this is true!)

Crappy Apartment utilities (electric, gas, cable) – $150/month

Food (other then your fast food meals you get while working) – $300/month

That’s $1700.  Let’s say we’ll leave the extra $100 for emergencies.

Is this living?

Now, let’s look at it from McDowell’s standpoint.  Unlike their ‘fast food’ friends at Moo Cluck Moo – which average check for a family of four is north of $40.  The average check for a family of four to eat at McDowell’s is probably closer to $25.  That extra $15 per check – does a lot.  It definitely makes it easier to pay $15/hr.

My point isn’t that we should be paying fast food workers more.  Someone choosing a career in the Fast food arts shouldn’t expect to make a ‘living wage’, they should expect to make a wage you can’t live on.  I love that Moo Cluck Moo is pushing the envelop in paying service workers and showing others that it can be done, on a small scale.  Can McDowell’s do it?  They could.  Are you willing to pay $15-20 more per meal for your family to eat at McDowell’s?  No, you’re not.  You will at Moo Cluck Moo – because it’s cool and hip and good.  But you can’t do that all the time.  It’s not sustainable on your living wage as a teacher, or accountant.  So, you sometimes have to go the cheaper route and eat at McDowell’s.

Simple economics will tell us that selling $.99 Double Cheeseburgers does not allow you to pay your hourly staff $15/hr and stay in business.  Charge $5 for that Double Cheeseburger and you can now pay $15/hr wages.  You will also have a drastic decrease in customers, so you’ll have to layoff most of your staff.  But those who remain will certainly be happy making $15/hr!

You can’t have it Fast — Good — and Cheap.  You must give up something.  Want McDowell’s to pay their workers a ‘living wage’?  Show them you won’t go away in droves when they double their prices.  You won’t do that.  If you won’t change — why should they change?

 

 

Has HR Evolved Enough To Allow Napping?

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Have you read any studies recently, or in the past, that said how beneficial naps are to high performance?  I bet you have.  Here’s one I read this week from the Wall Street Journal:

 “In a 2012 study in the journal Neurobiology of Learning and Memory, researchers split 36 college-aged students into three groups. Each group learned a memory task, pairing words on a screen with a sound. Afterward, one group had 60 minutes to nap, another 10 minutes. The final group didn’t sleep.

Upon retesting, the napping groups fared better, as expected, said Sara Alger, lead author of the study and a postdoctoral research associate at the University of Notre Dame.

More interesting, she noted, was that on further testing, including a week later, the 60-minute group performed far better than the 10-minute group, which now performed as poorly as the non-napping group. The researchers concluded that slow-wave sleep—only experienced by the 60-minute nappers—is necessary for memory consolidation.”

The benefits of napping is one of those things that we as a society, for the most part, completely agree with.  You never really ever hear anyone argue against it.  Naps are good.  So, why is napping at work still considered taboo?

Maybe a better question is: do you currently work at an organization where you would feel comfortable taking a nap, at work?

For the vast majority of you ready this the answer is ‘No’.  While the benefits of napping to productivity are unquestioned, we (American Society) still see napping as a sign of weakness, of fragility, of not being able to handle it.  There are a few of those ‘hip’ Silicon Valley companies who ‘allow’ napping, but for the most part who will not find napping rooms in most American companies.  You will not find HR in American companies encouraging their teams to ‘shut-it-down’ at 2pm and having nap time across the company.

Don’t get me wrong, you will find American employees sleeping on the job!  But don’t worry, HR will ‘handle’ that!  I myself have fired employees for ‘sleeping’ on the job.  The issue isn’t if napping is good for productivity.  The issue is those employees getting fired for sleeping are doing it without consent or permission.

I wonder if employees, I even think about my own team, if told — “Hey, from now on out you can take a one hour nap at work!” — would they take advantage?  I’m sure they would take advantage if they were told it wouldn’t effect their start and end times.  What if you told your workforce — “We are now working 8am to 6pm, but from 2pm-3pm we’ll all be taking a nap!”  How would that go over in your workplace.  I have a feeling that ‘taking a nap’ would become a very negative ‘policy’ change!

So, what say you HR Pros — Has HR (In America) Evolved Enough To Allow Napping at Work?

I say, No!

 

 

The Diversity of Productivity

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It’s widely held in the HR field that the most productive organizations are the most ‘diverse’.  The problem is that concept is misinterpreted by most HR Pros and executives.  Most still believe that concept pertains to the ethnic diversity of your team (the color of the faces you hire).  It might be the greatest fallacy in the HR industry today!   In actuality, Productivity has zero correlation with team ethnic diversity.  So, what kind of diversity does make us more productive?

From Fast Company:

“A growing body of research shows that diversity–in gender, thinking styles, and intro- and extroversion–is needed for teams to be their most productive.

Writing at 99u, Christian Jarrett, the psychologist-turned-writer behind the British Psychological Society’s superlative Research Digest blog“

You need 3 types of Diversity to get the most productivity out of your teams:

1. Gender

2. Thinking Style

3. Behavioral Style

None of those have anything to do with the color of your skin.

Let me breakdown the three types of diversity and why I think they have such impact to productivity:

Gender: To me this is good old nature at its best!  Boys want to impress girls, girls want to look good in front of boys — for the most part. Sometimes boys want to look good in front of other boys.  I get that, I’m that old.  The other thing with gender that I’ve learned from being married 20+ years, is that women and men sometimes think differently. Sometimes…which in itself will lead your team down a path in a number of ways, with a number options if you have a good gender mix.  Gender diversity on teams in relation to productivity might have the greatest impact to positive productivity over anything else we can do.

Thinking Style: Whereas Gender is probably underutilized by HR Pros to help productivity, Thinking Styles might be the one we most rely on when thinking about non-ethnic diversity!  “It’s Diversity of thought!” is the most over utilized statement in diversity.  Primarily because so few of us actually use real scientific tools to measure what someone’s thinking style is. “Oh, Tim’s old and a republican so he must think one way, and Mary is young and democrat so she thinks this opposite!”  Is potentially so wrong, yet how most organization determine ‘Diversity of Thought’.

Behavioral Style:  Having both introverted and extroverted individuals on a team is huge.  Too many people like me on a team and no one gets a word in edge-wise.  Too many introverted folks and either nothing happens, or the one extroverted person controls the entire process.  All can be very bad.  Getting your introverts in an environment where they are comfortable to share their knowledge is key to your organizations performance.

This is not a message that is being shared to your executives at most organizations.  They are still very ‘black and white’ in their thoughts on diversity.  While ethnic diversity can make great additions to your workplace culture, don’t mistake it for having positive impact to your productivity.  There isn’t any science that proves this, yet.

Top HR Lies

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In the never ending quest to beat a blog series to death, let’s hope this is my last installment of “Top Lies” (Top Candidate Lies, Top Recruiter Lies).

At this point I’ve completely pissed off ‘candidates’, made some fun of Recruiters, so now it’s time to really have some fun with the easiest target of all  — HR!  For the most part my peers in HR have fairly thick skin.  HR is actually use to being made the joke in the professional world.  The only profession that gets made fun of worse is probably lawyers!  I could do an entire post on why HR lacks respect, but that has been done a thousand times and in reality having respect in HR isn’t a professional dilemma, it’s a personal one!  If you’re in HR and don’t have respect in your organization, don’t blame the HR profession, you need to look in the mirror!

All that being said, HR might be the king of the liars in your organization!  Let’s break down a few of Top HR Lies:

– “In HR we are here for ‘our’ Employees!”  — HR is not an employee advocate.  HR supports the organization’s leadership and mission.  BTW – many HR Pros don’t even get this concept! When push comes to shove, HR will always support that way leadership wants to go, not the way employees want to go.

– “You can tell HR, we are always confidential!” — No we’re not! HR has an obligation to look out for the best interest of the organization, not you.  If you tell HR something ‘confidentially’, there is a very good chance that information will be shared with others in the organization.  The reality.  HR has to mitigate the risk of the organization.  Your craziness has risk to it.

– “We had no idea layoffs were coming…” —  Sorry, but we did.  But we just can’t tell you that and create panic throughout the organization.  So, we lie. It sucks, but there isn’t any other way.

– “No, you can’t change your health benefits until next Open Enrollment, it’s the law!”  — Yeah, that’s kind of a lie as well!  There are laws governing when we ‘have’ to allow you to change your benefits (marriage, child being born, divorce, etc.), but HR can decide to change the plan rules and allow you to change if we wanted. But, that becomes a logistical nightmare!  Even with keeping our plan rules intact, we can still get around it.  Let’s say you are a young employee and chose the crappy low-cost catastrophic major medical plan that basically covers nothing, but you’re young and nothing will ever happen to you. Then, something does happen to you.  You come to HR. HR says, “We told you so! Sorry, you have to wait until next Open Enrollment, have fun with that cancer!”  HR could actually fire you on a Friday, hire you back on Monday and have you sign up for the ‘new’ insurance.  Based on your plan there could be some audit risk based on IRS code, section 125 – so check it out before you go do this. But, it’s not like you’re doing this all the time – this is maybe once a year for a desperate situation – I’ll take that risk (and have) to help my employee in this situation!

– “We fire people!”  — HR has never fired anyone, ever.  Managers of of employees fire people.  HR just supports that decision, and frequently influences a manager to make that decision, but we don’t pull the trigger.  Managers blame HR — “HR is telling me I have to do this”, but that’s a lie as well.  HR advises of the consequences if certain actions aren’t taken. Ultimately, leaders make the final decision on what is actually going to happen.

– “Top performers get rewarded!” — Actually, in most organizations even average performers get rewarded….and low performers.  We have a compensation plan and don’t want to leave anyone out. So, you can be great and get a 3% raise. Your cube mate could be a slug and get a 1% raise.  How does that feel?

–  “We treat everyone equally!” — The reality is we treat certain employees better and give them more leeway to screw up, because they are more valuable to the organization.  Not all employees are create equal.  That was just something that sounded good on the poster for the break room.   Some employees are actually substantially more valuable to the organization than you are.  We treat them differently.

– “We value diversity and inclusion!” — We actually really don’t give a crap about this.  It gets shoved down our throats, legally, organizationally, etc. What we really care about is filling positions with solid talent.  But leadership makes me provide a report that counts the color of faces, so now we have to care.  So we care about the number of faces, not the true sense of diversity.  Don’t hate the players, hate the game.

Alright HR Pros – What Lies Did I Forget?