HR You’re the GM of your Company!

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I’m a huge baseball fan – specifically a Detroit Tiger fan – and I was reminded last week by the Tigers how important talent is to your organization and how HR could be at the center of it all.  In professional sports, like Major League Baseball, they call the main person in charge a General Manager (GM).  He’s the person behind the scenes (kind of like HR) making deals to keep their club competitive during the season or looking into the future.  It’s a very strategic role.  While they are not managing or coaching players on a daily basis, or playing the game – ultimately they are making decisions that have huge impact to the team you watch play the game.  Doesn’t that sound like a role you would love to have in HR?

The Tigers made some major moves last week to a team that is already one of the best in the majors.  Why would a GM do such a thing?  It would be like you going into your sales department, who is having record breaking sales, and moving on of your top sales people out and bring in someone new.  Doesn’t seem like it makes sense – if it’s not broke, why break it! The Tigers were facing a couple of things – 1. the pending suspension of their starting shortstop; 2. the need to bolster their pitching staff for a run at the world series.  They also have some long term needs – an aging short stop, so they need someone for the future.  I know, I know – boring sports stuff – but it shows how HR should be thinking in a similar matter.  How do we keep our organization running smoothly, and how do we make it better in the future – those two things don’t necessarily go together.

It’s HR’s job to figure all of this out.  It’s actually easier as an HR Pro to come into a broken company.  At that point you know what has to be done, and you start doing it.  If you come into a great company the question is how do you make it better, and potentially any change you make might make it worse.  Harder yet, is how do you make that organization better, when it’s already doing great?  Your the GM what do you do?  Sit on your hands and ride out the run?  Look to the future and start getting the next generation ready?  It’s the heart of people strategy and the single coolest thing we get to do in HR!

The Tigers are one of the top teams in the MLB for a simple reason – they have one of the best GM’s, Dave Dombrowski.  He constantly is looking for ways to make his team better, but also not mortgaging the future away be giving away their developing talent. It’s a difficult balance.  It’s the same in your role in HR.  Your organization needs you to find ways to make them better right now, and keep them great in the future – sometimes that means making unpopular changes.  Sometimes that means you’ll be helping influence your leaders to make courageous decisions.  Decisions you not only have to support, but champion.  A good GM helps the fans of their organization see the bigger picture – half marketing person, half prophet. HR needs to do the same.  Our employees look to leadership and HR during major decisions and changes to see the reactions.  They analyze every word, every facial expression and read into everything. Great GM’s/HR Pros know how to paint a bright future and a realistic positive outlook presence.  Are you ready to be the GM of your organization?

Why Shrinking College Enrollment Is A Bad Sign For HR

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Colleges and Universities will have fewer students this fall as enrollments across the board are falling.  The reasons?  It’s a number of factors – decline in college-aged kids, rising tuition costs and continued soft job market for new college grads, is making it a perfect storm for students to decide to forgo college and try and get into the job market in any job they can.  The idea being  – why go to college and come out in debt, when those who have are getting the same job I’ll get – service oriented, lower end jobs, sales positions that don’t require a degree, etc.

Here’s the big issue for employers – we need those kids in school to fill future jobs!

While the government and analyst continue to say the U.S. has a soft job market – those HR/Talent Pros in the trenches are seeing something very different!  Not enough ‘qualified’ workers for the jobs we have.  Not enough skills and training, increasing numbers of retirees and 5 plus years of not funding our own corporate training programs, have left many employers short on talent.  Having fewer college graduates in the future will only add to the shortage of a trained, technical workforce.   The current lack of STEM talent in all areas of the country is startling – and this only gets fixed by having more students in those programs, not less.

In the last year alone Microsoft released a report showing that the unemployment rate for STEM related jobs is at 3.4% – where ‘full employment’ of a field, by government standards, is considered to be between 4-5%.  These figures are during the recession!  In Michigan alone the automotive industry is searching for thousands of engineers and IT professionals – with graduates of STEM programs coming out to multiple offers and compressing salaries in many organizations.  Many other parts of the country are showing positive signs of coming out of the recession as well.  This adds to the issue of lower college enrollment as employers will soon be taking more STEM kids before graduation with the lure of money and instant employment.  We are already hearing stories about this during this summer’s internship season where engineering and IT interns are being asked to stay on full time and salaries very close to those who have already graduated.  Many students will drop out, figuring there is no need to finish, or that they’ll finish later in non-traditional formats.  Most never will.

All of these factors adds to that giant tsunami of retirements that will continue to hit over the next 5-10 years as baby boomers continue to leave the workforce.  How will companies cope?  Many will do what they have been doing for years – moving technical and engineering centers overseas where other countries have far surpassed the U.S. in STEM graduation rates.  It’s a complex time to be in HR in America – on one hand we still have relatively high unemployment as a country, but on the other we have a severe shortage of skilled workers.  The President and Congress believe ‘training’ unskilled workers to be skilled workers is the answer.  It’s not.  That is like telling a Doctor that they will be trained as a Dancer!  It takes more than desire to want to be a talented Engineer or IT Professional – it takes more than being an expert on Xbox.  It takes some real analytical ability – which most unskilled workers don’t have.

What can HR do?  Keep your workers.  Find ways to ensure those who want to retire can continue to work but add flexibility and part-time arrangements where you didn’t have them before. Continue to invest in technology – because you will have to do more with less.  Get ready to pay – because STEM workers will hold the negotiating power – more than they hold it now!  What else?  Don’t let your babies grow up to be Cowboys. Don’t let them pick guitars and drive them old trucks….Get it?  When your kid says they want to go to college and study something that they struggle to get a job – do what parents do – help direct them down another path – an easier life path of being employed.

 

The “Lost Dog” Recruitment Strategy

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I’m up today over at Halogen Software’s HR Blog talking about the time I lost my dog and what it taught me about recruitment. Here’s a snippet:

“When I was a kid, our family dog, Tippy, ran away. We’d had Tippy for a number of years, so as you can imagine, this situation was heartbreaking.

I think we did what any family would do to find our lost dog.

My Dad worked the neighborhoods by car — window down, yelling Tippy’s name, stopping to speak to neighbors to see if they had seen our little dog.

My Mom, sister and I made signs. You know the ones:

LOST DOG! Reward! Please call!

And of course a picture.

We posted the signs on every telephone poll within a half mile radius of our house.

Within a few days, we got a call from a retired guy who’d seen our signs, found our dog in his yard, and was able to coax him into the garage for safe keeping until we could come and get him.”

Click here to find out how your recruitment Strategy, is like me losing my dog…

I’m kind of like Paul Harvey today – click over you’ll get to find out the rest of the story…

 

The One Email Every Employee Wants To Send

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Please raise your hand if you have ever drafted an email that you desperately wanted to fire off to your entire organization, or leadership, only to delete it – so to not ruin your career? I know most of you have  – because sometimes, in HR, we get to deal with those poor souls who didn’t have the will power to push ‘Delete’ and instead pushed ‘Send’.  In the HR business we call those employees – ‘Former Employees’!  I’ve coined a name for those emails – I like to call them ‘The Lotto Email’!  It’s the email you would feel comfortable sending the moment you return from picking up that overly sized Powerball check you just won.  You now have I-Don’t-Give-A-Sh*t money – and you’re completely unfiltered.

I don’t hold out hope I will ever win the lottery – but I imagine the email might look something like this:

Dear Fellow Employees,

I’m Rich Beeatch! (click here for context)

That being said I’d like to say a few things before not packing up any of this crap in my office and leaving forever.  To make this easier for you to cut and paste and send around later, I’ll bullet point this out into chunks – USA Today style – because I know most of you are slow and lose attention quickly:

– Mr. CEO – I know you think it’s probably adorable how you make comments about every woman in the office’s ass behind closed doors, but it’s not, it’s creepy – just like you.

– Mr. CFO – You’re an accountant – calm down – you’re not that important – just tell how much money we have and go back to being boring.

– Mrs. HR – Nobody likes you – this is just confirmation. BTW – everyone lies on your engagement surveys because all the managers use them as weapons, so it’s easier to lie and make you feel like what you do actually matters – it doesn’t.

– Mrs. COO – The CEO constantly talks about your ass. Hope that makes your meetings going forward more comfortable.

– Mary – I’ve always wanted to tell you that you are drop dead gorgeous, but your low self-esteem keeps you married to a complete asshole! I’m better than that – I won’t be that asshole. Here’s your chance – walk out of here with me Jerry Maguire style and let’s do this – otherwise I’m probably 5 drinks and 2 hours away from making some real bad decisions at a strip club.

– Ted – You’re a douche bag – everyone hates you.

There’s a bunch of other stuff I could to say – but really the only thing I really want to say is: I’m Rich Beeatch!

See you in the parking lot, Mary.

Former Employee

Obviously this wouldn’t be ‘my’ letter because I’m the President of my company!  My letter would be a lot of thanking everyone for everything and I’ll see you around, if you’re ever in the South of France on a large yacht – plus a bunch of positive stuff and how valuable each and every employee was to me personally. Follow by – “I’m Rich Beeatch!”

 

I’m Going to the 2013 HR Tech Conference!

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If you read this blog you know that I’ve attended the SHRM National Conference for years.  There is also one other conference – The HR Technology Conference – that I haven’t missed for the last 4 years, and now that my friend, Steve ‘The Call Him Mr. HR Tech’ Boese, is running the show – I doubt highly I’ll miss again!   I love attending The HR Tech conference for a number of reasons that are different from why I like attending SHRM – but I think both should be on the list of every serious HR Pro.  If you can only attend one – might I recommend every other year between the two.

Here’s why I attend The HR Tech Conference:

 1. HR Technology Smarts! (Duh! Right.  But listen, great HR Tech knowledge is the one way Trench HR Pros can separate themselves from the pack!  Want to move far in your HR Career – this is a must have competency for the now and for the future.  HR Tech does something better than most in that most of the speakers I’ve seen are like you and me – they actually work in HR.)

2. The Crowd!  (The HR Tech Conference pulls in a completely different crowd than SHRM.  I love the SHRM crowd – I feel one with the Trench HR Pros who go.  HR Tech is filled with HR decision makers!  You know the ones who can say yes to buying hundreds of thousands of dollars, if not millions, of cool HR tools.  Plus, some really smart HR pros who think about HR differently.)

3. The HR Vendors. (Any company in the HR space trying to make a name for themselves is there.  I first met HireVue at HR Tech 3 years ago in some back little booth with nobody around – and thought – ‘Holy shit! This is the future of interviewing’ – they a bit bigger now!  At HR Tech you actually get to see the future of HR before anyone else.  It’s like going to the annual Car Shows and seeing the concept vehicles!  How we work in HR will be different 5 years from now – want to know how – attend and find out!)

The 2013 HR Technology Conference will also be the last for the ‘Godfather of HR Tech’, Bill Kutik (that’s Bill in the picture above!), as he passes on the torch to aforementioned, Steve Boese.  That is one final reason I’m attending.  Bill has had a huge impact on HR Technology in his tenure and that should be celebrated.

Here’s one reason you should attend – the gang at HR Tech (because I blog a bunch and they think I’m influential – jikes on them!) has given me a special discount code ‘SACKETT’ – which saves you $500 of the price of the conference.  Sign up HERE!

Besides the $500 – I’ll let you buy me a drink or take me to a cool Las Vegas show!  Your choice!

 

Top Recruiter Lies

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So, last week, I wrote a little HR blog post called – ‘Top Candidate Lies‘ and it got a rather large reaction.  LinkedIn’s What’s Hot picked it up from TLNT (ERE’s HR website which re-blogs some of my work) – and in a little over 8 hours, over 75,000 people read the post, and over 500 comments (at TLNT’s site)!  Cool for me, right!?  Well, let’s just say there were a ‘few’ folks who didn’t agree with my post – so I took a bit of beating – as did the Recruiting Profession in general.

Basically, from the Top Candidate Lies post, there three camps:

1. Recruiters – where about 99% agreed with the lies, and found it funny

2. Job Seekers – who honestly had one of these things happen to them, now understood that some recruiters might see these as lies, and wanted help in how they should address (I got over 50 person emails like this – which was cool and made for a busy weekend)

3. The Haters – these folks assumed all ‘candidates’ were out of work people, and they weren’t lying or had to lie to get a job.  There’s really no logic in addressing these folks, like: many candidates lie and are actually employed, candidates lie because they just don’t want to tell the recruiter the truth (more on this later) or candidates lie because most candidates lie! The Haters also pointed out that Recruiters Lie!  For which I say – “yes, yes they do!”

I love The Haters passion, though, so I wanted to go down that road of the Top Recruiter Lies – Here you go Haters!

– Send Us Your Resume, Even Though We Don’t Have a Job Lie – this was pointed out by a few people – I would say this is a ‘semi-lie’  (how do you like that haters!).  While the recruiter might not have the opening currently, they’re asking for a resume because they frequently have those openings and they never know when one is coming. The recruiter, though, is wrong by not telling you this up front, so you know what to expect.

– The Hiring Manager Hasn’t Gotten Back To Me Lie – This is a lie and not a lie – potentially!  For Corporate Recruiters this is a lie or lazy – you pick.  If you’re a corporate recruiter and tell the candidate that the hiring manager hasn’t gotten back to you – get your butt up from your desk and walk over to the hiring managers desk.  If they’re in a different location and won’t get back to you – you have an influence problem you need to work on.  Agency-wise it’s the one frustrating things recruiters have to deal with – Hiring Managers will get to ‘us’ when they feel like it, and usually after they’ve exhausted every other opportunity internally to fill the position.

– The Never Call Back the Candidate Lie – this really isn’t a lie – but The Haters pointed this out happens all the time!  For the sake of Recruiters everywhere – if you do this – please quit this profession – we (all Recruiters) Hate you as well.  You give all of us a bad name.  It takes 10 seconds to call back a candidate you spoke to a job about, and tell them “Sorry, you were not chosen – stay in touch, don’t call me again, etc.”  10 seconds!  Haters – bad Recruiters don’t call you back because they have major conflict avoidance and don’t like telling people negative stuff like – “You’re not good enough, we found someone better” or just a simple Lie “we filled it internally”.

– The You Didn’t Score High Enough On The Assessment Lie – The company you’re trying to get into might actually have cut-off scores they’ve established – the lie comes into play when a hiring manager presents someone they’ve worked with previously and that person scores the same as you – but still gets the job.  If they really like you – the assessment won’t stop them from hiring you.

– The We’ve Decided To Go Another Direction Lie – This comes along with the ‘We really liked you, but” Lie.  This is Recruiter training 101 – to not get yourself into trouble when telling a candidate they didn’t get the job – give them a reason that legally can never come back and bite you in the butt.  “We really, really, really liked but have decided to not fill the position.”  Two weeks later a job posting comes out that seems very similar but with a title change and a few description changes.  They didn’t like you.

The biggest reason Recruiters lie?  They have major conflict avoidance and are not willing to tell you the truth, which is usually there is something wrong with you – based on what they are looking for and don’t want to hurt your feelings.  Unfortunately, many candidates would actually be helped by a little Recruiter honesty – but recruiters are afraid of candidates who get told the truth – and then get charges from the EEOC, other state or federal agencies, or just get flat out sued.  Candidates have a hard time with feedback like – “you’re really creepy”, “you’re annoying” or “your personality is grating”.  So, the lies come – because Recruiters have found Lies are easier than the truth.

Ok, Haters – your turn – which Recruiter Lies did I forget?  Hit me, not literally, in the comments…

What Detroit’s Bankruptcy and Your Company Have In Common

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Big news last week was that the City of Detroit filed for bankruptcy.  Made national headlines as being the largest municipality in the history of America to do so – yet, I think most people, nationally, are really not surprised.  For decades Detroit has had a horrible reputation as being the murder capital of the world, corrupt politicians, GM going under and the government rescuing it, and everything that is wrong with unions.  Besides a few shining moments from local professional sports teams, there are really never any positive national stories coming out of Detroit.   Fast Company believed Detroit was so far beyond repair, and they were probably right, that Detroit should be bulldozed and turned into farm land.  Basically, hit the reset button.

As you know, I’m a core problem kind of person.  I believe at the heart of most issues, there is a core problem that has created all the issues your are facing.  Most organizations, like Detroit and your own companies, don’t like solving the core problem – you like solving all the little symptoms that the core problem is/has created.  People catch the common cold and take cold medicine – yet study after study show that washing your hands is really the only thing that is going to keep you getting the cold, and those same studies show most people still don’t wash their hands often enough or long enough to not catch the cold.  We like solving symptoms!  It gives us little wins and makes us feel successful. Solving core problems takes a lot of work, usually takes unpopular difficult decisions and many times the success isn’t immediately seen.

So what is Detroit’s core problem?  That is really up for debate – but it’s core Detroit is a victim of its own success. The great Automotive Industry that gave so much to the City of Detroit ended up being its downfall.  Relying solely and completely on one industry bankrupted Detroit.  Everything else is a symptom of time and function.  Rely on one product, service, etc. long enough and eventually the life cycle of that product or service will catch up with you.  The city is just a victim of that life cycle. Here’s some facts from Morgan Housel at  The Motley Fool:

“But the largest driver of Detroit’s demise is a simple, startling fact: the city’s population declined 65% in the last six decades. No city can survive such an exodus; it’s actually amazing Detroit’s finances lasted this long.

The Motor City was home to 1.9 million people in 1950, at the time nearly identical in size to Los Angeles. Today, 700,000 inhabit Detroit, or less than a fifth the size of L.A. That works out to 2.2 people leaving Detroit every hour, 24 hours a day, for the last 63 years.

If the number of people who left Detroit in the last sixty years formed their own city, it would be the nation’s ninth largest, ahead of Dallas, Texas…

Detroit shows how organizations that can’t adapt eventually crumble. Before it was a technology hub, San Francisco relied on shipping, and before that, gold mining. Before New York was the financial capital of the world, it was the garment capital of the world…Detroit was overwhelmingly reliant on the auto industry. When the fate of three companies — General Motors (NYSE: GM), Ford (NYSE: F), and Chrysler — turned, so went the entire city’s fate. Evan Soltas of Bloomberg wrote, “Detroit’s dependence on cars wasn’t exactly the problem. It was dependence itself. Cities should never go all in on any industry, cars or otherwise. It didn’t realize that until it was too late.”

Detroit can easily be your company.  Don’t kid yourself into thinking it can’t be – that is another major mistake generations of Detroit’s leaders made.  “We are different” “Everyone will always need cars.”  “Everyone will always need Facebook.” “Everyone will always need $125 running shoes.” Everyone will always need…you fill in the blank.  Diversification is the only thing that can truly mitigate your risk – and it’s one of those ‘core’ problems at almost every company.  It’s tough because we are told to ‘be the best at what you do’ and it’s hard being the best at many things and be diversified.  We can’t save Detroit – it needs to be reborn – but you can save your company – focus on core problems and stop solving symptoms.

 

Inclusion – As Defined By A Conservative White Guy

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Before I go off – let me say I’m 100% sure Pro Diversity and Inclusion camps don’t have me in mind to be their spokesperson.  You see I’m white. I’m middle-aged. I’m a male.  I tend to lean conservative in my political views, moderately.  So, if you’re really into Diversity and Inclusion – I can totally see why you’ll immediately discount everything I’m about to say.  If I was a women – a black woman – a liberal black woman – a liberal black woman in a wheelchair  – well then – I’d expect you’d listen pretty closely. Right? Don’t kid yourself.

If that’s the case – you’re as closed minded as you believe I am.

I’m completely sick and tired of hearing about Diversity and Inclusion in the way it is being advocated for by my HR brothers and sisters.  It literally makes me sick to my stomach.  Here’s why – with every program, every communication you espouse about your organization being ‘Inclusive’ – what you’re really saying is –

“ABC Company values Inclusion as long as you’re view points are the same view points that we share.”

This isn’t Inclusion!  This is ‘Exclusion’ to the definition!  But you’re selling it as Inclusion.  Am I insane!? (Don’t answer that – it was rhetorical!) Or did someone change what Inclusion really means?

You see – by my middle aged white conservative viewpoint – Inclusion means we should accept everyone – all view points, all colors, all shapes and sizes.  But when ‘I’ the middle aged white conservative guy wants to share ‘my’ beliefs – your organization doesn’t want to hear those.  What you want to hear is that I really have liberal beliefs, that I support abortion, that I think marijuana is harmless, that tattoos are super cool, that everyone should be working from home, that all people have the ability to do all jobs, that I’m not religious – and if I am it’s a religion that you totally support, and that if my religious beliefs somehow don’t support your liberal view of inclusion that I’ll never speak those views publicly and make those employees who do have different views that I uncomfortable – although it’s fine if they throw their views in my face, since that is what ‘Inclusion’ is all about…

The funny thing is – I would define myself as a fiscal conservative, socially liberal and I don’t go to church but was raised around many religions- so I can adapt and fit into almost anywhere.  But since I’m white and middle aged and voted Republican – I can’t fit into most of your Inclusion demographics – which is again is funny to me – since Inclusion is defined as:

“the act of including or the state of being included”

No where in the dictionary did the definition include: “if you believe the same things we believe ‘inclusion’ to mean” or “if you some form of minority”.  The definition is short and clear – Inclusion means everyone is included – even Me – middle aged conservative white guy!  My HR peers are forgetting the “Inclusive” part of “Inclusion”.  I’m reminded of this daily, not because of my own demographic makeup – but I have a 70 year old father still in the work force and he continues to share stories with me about how his 50 years of experience is no longer relative.  That somehow 50 years of experience is becoming worthless.  That on a daily basis – he feels his organization is less inclusive, and more exclusive – because the only people who know anything are the young.  Again – Inclusive-Exclusion at its finest.

But – I understand while you’ll discount this – I’m not liberal – I’m not a minority – the only disability I have is horrible grammar.  I don’t count.  Maybe we can call this ‘new’ Inclusion – “Inexclusion” – being inclusive to those that we share our same ideas, beliefs and opinions.  What do you think?

Why ‘Recruiter’ is the best job in HR.

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I grew up and lived most of my life in Michigan.  There are so many things I love about living in Michigan and most of those things have to deal with water and the 3 months that temperatures allow you to enjoy said water (Jun – Aug).  There is one major thing that completely drives me insane about Michigan.  Michigan is at its core an automotive manufacturing state which conjures up visions of massive assembly plants and union workers.  To say that the majority of Michigan workers feel entitled would be the largest understatement ever made.  We have grown up with our parents and grandparents telling us stories of how their overtime and bonus checks bought the family cottage, up north, and how they spent more time on their ‘pension’ than they actually spent in the plant (think about that! if you started in a union job at 18, put in your 30 years, retired at 48, on your 79 birthday you actually have had a company pay for you longer than you worked for them – at the core of the Michigan economy this is happening right now – and it’s disastrous!  Pensions weren’t created to sustain that many years, and quite frankly they aren’t sustainable under those circumstances).  Seniority, entitlement, I’ve been here longer than you, so wait your turn – are all the things I hate about my great state!

There is a saying in professional sports – “If you can play, you can play”.  Simply, this means that it doesn’t matter who you are, where you come from, how much your contract is worth – if you’re the best player, you will be playing.  We see examples of this in every sport, every year.  The kid was bagging groceries last month, now he’s start quarterback in the NFL!  You came from a rich family, poor family, no family – doesn’t matter – if you can play, you can play.  Short, tall, skinny, fat, pretty, ugly, smart, no-so smart – if you can play, you can play.  Performance on your specific field of play – is all that matters.  BTW – NHL released this video last year supporting the LGBT community (if you can play…) –

This is why I love being a recruiter!  I can play.

Doesn’t matter how long I’ve been doing it.  Doesn’t matter what education/school I came from.  Doesn’t matter what company I work for.  If you can recruit – you can recruit.  You can recruit in any industry, at any level, anywhere in the world.  Recruiting at its core is a perfect storm of showing us how accountability and performance in our profession works.  You have an opening – and either you find the person you need (success), or you don’t find the person (failure).  It’s the only position within the HR industry that is that clear cut.

I have a team of recruiters who work with me. Some have 20 years of experience, some have a few months – the thing that they all know – if you can recruit, you can recruit.  No one can take it away from you, no one can stop you from being a great recruiter.  There’s no entitlement or seniority – ‘Well, I’ve been here longer, I should be the best recruiter!’ If you want to be the best, if you have to go out and prove you’re the best.  The scorecard is your placements.  Your finds.  Can you find talent and deliver, or can’t you.  Black and white.

I love recruiting because all of us (recruiters) have the exact same opportunity.  Sure some will have more tools than others – but the reality is – if you’re a good recruiter – you need a phone and an ability to connect with people.  Tools will make you faster – not better.  A great recruiter can play.  Every day, every industry.  This is why I love recruiting.

Top Candidate Lies

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Every Monday morning I have a meeting with my recruiting team – it’s a great way to kick off the week – we share what we are working on, we talk about problems we are having on specific searches so the team can share ideas and tips, maybe even a possible candidate they know of, etc.  We also share stories!  Monday mornings are great for sharing recruiter stories – horrible interviews interviews, funny excuses candidates have, negotiating nightmares – you name it, we talk about it!

I was reminded this week how bad of liars candidates can be – we get a lot of candidate lying stories in Monday morning meetings!  So, as a shout out to my Recruiters – and all recruiters – I wanted to put together a list of the Top Candidate Lies.  When I started thinking about all the lies, I found I could break it down by category – so here goes – hit me in the comments if you have a favorite that you get – or think of one I missed:

The Education Lies

– “I have all the credits, I just didn’t graduate.”

– “I did all the classes, I just need to pay the fees to graduate.” (so you spent 4+ years going to school, got done, but that last couple of hundred dollars stopped you from graduating…)

– “I graduated from ‘State U’, but it was a long time ago, I’m not sure why they can’t verify my degree.”

– “I had a 3.0 GPA in my ‘core’ classes, but a 1.9 GPA overall…”

– “Well, it was an Engineering/Business degree.”

The Background Check Lies

– “No, I’m not on drugs.” Then fails drug screen. “Oh, you meant Marijuana as a drug…” 

– “She told me she was 18.”

– “They told me in court that never would be on my file, so I didn’t think I needed to tell you.”

–  “No, I don’t have a felony.” (Oh, that felony! But that was in Indiana…)

The Experience Lies

– “When you said Java, I thought you meant experience making coffee.”

– “I was a part of the ‘leadership’ team that was responsible for that implementation.” (So, basically you knew of a project that happened while you were working there…)

The No-Show Interview Lies

– “My car broke down.” (Either through some fantastic wrinkle in space, or gigantic amount of lying, candidates have more car trouble per capita than anyone else ever in the world who has driven a car)

– “I couldn’t find the location.” (So, your answer to this dilemma was to turn around and go home and not call and let us know you got lost?)

– “My son/daughter got sick, so I can’t make it.” (Again – crazy coincidences that happen with candidates and sick kids…)

The Termination Lies

– “It was a mutual decision that I left.” (“So, you’ll ‘mutually’ decided that you would no longer have a job?”, is the question I always ask after this statement! Candidates – this statement sounds as stupid as it reads.)

– “I (or any family member) was in a bad accident and in the hospital, so they fired me for not showing up to work.” (No they didn’t – there are some bad companies out there, but no company does this.)

– “I play on a softball team and after games we go out and have a couple drinks. The next morning my boss smelled alcohol and fired me for drinking on the job.” (This was a true lie I got from an employee – it started out as me just giving him a written warning – until I went lunch, not joking – 10 minutes later at the Chili’s down the street from the office, and there he was belly up to the bar drinking a beer…upon cleaning out his desk we found a half a fifth of vodka.)

Here’s my take on candidate lies – candidates continue to lie, because Talent/HR Pros don’t call them out on it.  We (HR) also perpetuate this problem by hiring the folks who give you the crappy lie, but don’t hire the folks who come clean and tell you the truth.

 

Check out my follow up to this post: Top Recruiter Lies!