My Wife Approves of this Blog Post! (And we have a rule I can’t write about her!)

Posted on May 30, 2018 by Tim Sackett

Around Mother’s Day, the PR folks at Salary.com sent me an infographic. (Editor’s Note: please do not take this as an invitation to send me your infographic! I get at least one per day. I know it’s your job to push these onto people in hopes they’ll publish and you’ll get SEO, but most of them are awful. Yes, you’re is awful!) This salary.com piece caught my eye because it listed what a Stay-at-Home Mom should make for a salary!

So, what do you think that amount is!?

For 2018, salary.com figured a stay-at-home Mom should make a salary of $162,581!!!

That’s a nice salary! I will tell you my wife definitely makes that much! Because she takes home 100% of what I take home! 😉 BTW – Mom’s got a $5000 raise from 2017. Pretty nice!

Check out the infographic – it lists Mom’s salary from 2009 ($122,732) to present. I think Mom’s in 2009 were way overpaid by the way!

My wife and I have an agreement, a marriage contract, that I can’t write about her, which I break about 2-3 times per year. I try to break it in the best way possible that makes her look like the Hall of Fame wife and mom she is, and in return puts me in good graces! She says I should write a book on how to be a good husband because I’m 100% a great husband about 60% of the time.

So, I need to break down this $162,581. That’s a big number, but like most compensation figures, it’s just magically made up from bad data and we just end up paying the figure that we have to pay, if we want the talent. Yes, that was a shot a the compensation ~~profession~~, err, ~~arts~~, err, black magic…

My wife is worth $162,581 assuming I actually have that much to pay her. Otherwise, she’s probably worth more or less, based on the budget!

Here’s what I, and my 3 boys, get for my $162,581:

Unlimited consultation with every decision and action we take.
Expert advice on everything, except technology and anything out of doors.
Someone who will fight to the death for your honor, will also putting you in your place.
A magical person who somehow gets out every stain.
A house so clean people think we must be selling it.
An endless supply of boxes on the front porch for places like Amazon, JCrew, Ann Taylor, Banana Republic, Target, etc.
Well prepared meals that are both tasty and nutritious, unless it’s been a hard day, then it’s probably pizza.
A full rundown and recap of what my family has been up to on social media all day.
A fully functioning teacher that knows something about everything. Plus, full editing capabilities on all papers.
Exercise coach and in-home Physical Therapist. Untrained Nurse Practitioner, but fully functioning.
Pet Therapist, dog walker, Vet assistant.
Neighborhood Uber driver and security guard.
Other wifely duties I’m contractually obligated not to discuss on this blog or any public forum.

I know I’m missing things. It would impossible to actually list out all of the duties of a stay-at-home mom, because they get asked to do everything!

If my wife goes away from 24 hours, our world falls apart and I quit the job of stay-at-home Dad before she gets far enough away from the house to hear me scream in terror! Stay-at-home moms are the real superheroes in the world.

I’ve been telling this to anyone who will listen for years now, the best hire you will ever make in your business, is to hire a woman who had to stay at home and raise kids for an extended period of time! They actually love coming to work, and they work! It’s like magic!

When a hiring manager tells me they don’t want to interview a woman because she has been at home for 5 years, I punch them in the face and fire them, because they’re an idiot! They have the potential to hire a unicorn! You don’t ever pass up hiring a unicorn!

Your Weekly Dose of HR Tech: @TextRecruit Drip Campaigns Really Work!

Posted on May 29, 2018 by Tim Sackett

Today on the Weekly Dose I review TextRecruit‘s new Drip Campaign feature that my team is actually really using!

So, I don’t talk a lot about my tech stack, because I think it’s a real differentiator when it comes to running a staffing company. In fact, I’m fairly cocky about telling clients I know for a fact, my tech stack is better than theirs, which is why my team can find and attract talent faster than theirs can!

We use TextRecruit.

Why?

Because being able to text candidates, more than one at a time, is critical for recruiting success. Plus, I need a way for my recruiting team to manage multiple text conversations at a time, and a platform that will capture all of those conversations.

So, we have been using TextRecruit with a high rate of success when it comes to getting more reply rates than we could with email, InMail, and phone calls.

So, what are Drip Campaigns using TextRecruit?

Drip Campaigns are a series of automated text messages built to drive deeper engagement with candidates. They help you automate text messages based on whether your candidates respond, and engage them with the right message at the right time.

They work like this:

Create the different messages you want to send to your candidates and decide how much time you want between them
Once you start your campaign, candidates that respond will stop receiving messages while unresponsive candidates move to the next drip message
After the campaign, you can check your analytics to see your response rates

We do a lot of message testing so it might look something like this:

Message #1 – “Hey ‘Candidate name’ it’s Tim from HRU. I’ve got this awesome position we need to talk about. Let me know when you’re available.”

No response.

Message #2 – “”Candidate Name”, it’s Tim again! Here’s the link to that position I texted you about. Contact me back and I can give you more details!”

Still no response.

Message #3 – “It’s Tim! I’m stalking you! No, really, I really do think you’ll like this position. Just let me know “Yes” or “No” and I’ll stop bugging you about this position.”

What!? Still no response. Remember, even a response of “No, I’m not interested” is a good response, because now you at least know something about that candidate, and you can respond back with “Okay! Is there something you would be interested in and I’ll make sure I put that note on your profile?”

Message #4 – “Last Chance! I don’t want to assume you’re not interested until I really hear from you. Here’s the link again. Just text me back!”

We set up the messages. The candidate sees it as a personal text to them, with their name embedded, if you have that as part of the message, and the TextRecruit technology does the rest! Easy to set up and use.

So, what’s the response rate?

70%! (this is my team’s response rate when using the drip campaign method – I can’t guarantee your results will be the same)

That’s an unreal number for recruiting response! You can send out 4 emails to 100 candidates in a drip campaign and you might get a 15-20% response rate. The cool thing is the technology is running the interactions and letting your recruiters respond to those who are interested.

TA pros and leaders ask me constantly how they can get more candidates. One thing that I know that works, is you need to start communicating with candidates in a mode they will respond to.

Editor’s note: I pay to use TextRecruit as part of my tech stack. Many will assume this is a paid commercial and I don’t pay for the tech. I do.

The Weekly Dose – is a weekly series here at The Project to educate and inform everyone who stops by on a daily/weekly basis on some great recruiting and sourcing technologies that are on the market. None of the companies who I highlight are paying me for this promotion. There are so many really cool things going on in the tech space and I wanted to educate myself and share what I find. If you want to be on The Weekly Dose – just send me a note – timsackett@comcast.net

Want help with your HR & TA Tech company – send me a message about my HR Tech Advisory Board experience.

Skilled Trades Aren’t Sexy to Gen Z and Millennials!

Posted on May 25, 2018 by Tim Sackett

Wow! Really!?

Here are some other things that might surprise you:

They also don’t hang out on Facebook
They like Smartphones and using Snapchat
You shouldn’t pee into the wind
They think you’re old!

No shit, Sherlock, that younger people don’t find the Skilled Trades sexy!

I’m old. I was listening to NPR on way to work the other day and this well-meaning Gen X dude gets on the radio and says, “the problem we have in skilled trades is that teens don’t find them sexy”.

I’m like, of course, they don’t find the skilled trades sexy. Most don’t even know what the heck ‘skilled trades’ means, and if you show them, they still won’t find them ‘sexy’! Okay, well not ‘sexy’, but they should see what a great, stable job the skilled trades can be.

Um, yeah, no, you understand how young people think, right!?

Stable. Good pay and benefits. Something you can do for forty years and get a good retirement and pension. Are all things that will get young people to run away from whatever it is you’re trying to fool them into doing!

So, how do I get young people interested in the Skilled Trades?

I don’t!!!

I get 35-year-old people interested in skilled trades!

You know what’s great about 35-year-old people? They can start to see the end. Sure that end is 25+ years out, but they start thinking I need to get my life together and do something that is (wait for it!), stable! Something that pays well and has ‘solid’ benefits. Something I can retire doing!

I don’t need 18-25-year-olds to fill skilled trades jobs. Those kids suck at showing up to work and listening! You know who’s really good at showing up to work and listening? 35-year-olds!

If you go into any retail store, gas station, restaurant, etc. and you say, “Hey, I’ve got a job that I’ll train you to do and you can earn a great living and have great benefits until you retire, and you’ll always have a job”, you’ll be like the Pied Piper leading people to your jobs!

The entire way we (and by “we”, I mean you!) is that you go hire 35-year-old people who have shown you that they are willing to show up to work, do work when they show up, but maybe they actually want to add something to their life that gives them a little more stability.

That 18-25-year-old doesn’t want your boring, stable, well-paying job, in which they must dirty their hands. They still have aspirations someone is going to pay them six figures to do nothing and give them a VP title.

By 35 we’ve had that beaten out of us. We’ve been humping $40K jobs for 15 years and we’ve almost, but not quite, given up on hope. You Mrs. Skilled Trades Job Lady are that beacon of hope!!!

Teens won’t solve the skilled trades shortage in America. That is something that is a waste of time for us to try and solve. “So, you, um, want me to stick my hand in a toilet!? Yeah, isn’t there an app for that?”

The 35-year-old has stuck their hands in worst places than toilets and they’re ready to work their butts off for your great skilled trades job. All they need is some love, some training, and a chance.

Skilled Trades jobs aren’t sexy to young people, but you already know that…

Career Confessions of Gen Z: Is Punctuality a Generational Thing?

Posted on May 24, 2018 by Tim Sackett

Hola todos! I am currently studying abroad in Granada, Spain for 6 weeks and I thought it would be a cool opportunity to focus on some things that I notice are either different or interesting about Spain/Europe! If you have any ideas for things that you want me to talk about, please leave a comment and let me know!

Something that I learned from a very young age and value very highly is punctuality. My parents (especially my Father) have instilled a need to be aggressively early for almost everything. My Dad likes to get to our sporting events (especially baseball tournaments) before they have even started setting up, and this need to be early has been passed down to me. My high school choir teacher always used to say “to be early is to be on time, to be on time is to be late, and to be late is to be left behind”. I would like to say that I try to follow this rule within my everyday life.

One thing that I’ve learned from my time in Spain is that many people arrive on what I like to call “Spanish time”, where everyone arrives/everything starts about 10 minutes after the stated time. I was warned about this upon arrival and I knew that this was going to be a struggle for me. I am the type of person that is always 10 minutes early for class and now you’re saying that I’m actually 20 minutes early! If there’s one thing I hate more than being late, it’s wasting time.

While talking with my host family and some local advisors of my program, I found out that “Spanish time” doesn’t apply to everything. People here show up on time for appointments or other important engagements, but for social gatherings, it is completely okay to arrive a little late. No one gets a little pissy if you show up 10 minutes late to your dinner plans because no one cares! (also they are probably 10 minutes late too).

I tend to get very annoyed with tardiness, and while I’ve been here, I deal with it every day. Rather than live my life in constant annoyance, I’ve tried to shift my mindset. I still value my punctuality very highly and arrive early to all of my classes, trips, or other important events, but I am trying to accept the tardiness of my peers in social settings.

As I’m looking to starting my first “real” job once I return from Spain, I am curious to see how punctuality in the workplace is maybe different in the US than in Spain. I don’t plan on arriving late to work, but I hope that if something happens (like Downtown Detroit traffic), that I won’t be ostracized for my tardiness.

My time has shown me that maybe it’s okay to adopt some of this mentality into our lives. In America, we tend to drive ourselves into the ground by being so busy, but we should allow a little bit of tardiness in non-serious situations. While I don’t think I’m going to start being late to everything, I am trying to adopt this attitude of valuing punctuality in important circumstances, but allowing for some lateness in a social setting. Let’s all be on time for our next doctor’s appointment, but relax a little bit next time your friend is 5 minutes late to dinner.

This post was written by Cameron Sackett (not Tim) – you can probably tell because it lacks grammatical errors!

HR and TA Pros – have a question you would like to ask directly to a Gen Z? Ask us in the comments and I’ll respond in an upcoming blog post right here on the project. Have some feedback for me? Again, please share in the comments and/or connect with me on LinkedIn.

Two Industries Leaders Launch Diversity & Inclusion Technology, @TalVistaHR!

Posted on May 23, 2018 by Tim Sackett

It was announced today that industry veterans, Elaine Orler and Scot Sessions have partnered up to launch the D&I technology platform TalVista. TalVista provides a view beyond the noise of unconscious bias in the hiring process. Now businesses can be more inclusive from the job description through to the interview.

Based on research, the words we use will either reveal our inclusive or exclusionary tendencies. Companies who combine our job description optimization and redacted resume reviewing with scripted and structured interviews now have a SaaS platform to mitigate unconscious bias. This will result in greater inclusivity with a more diverse and skilled workforce.

For those who were familiar with Talent Sonar, Elaine’s team acquired Talent Sonar and they are relaunching it as TalVista.

So, why should you be paying attention to TalVista?

– TalVista does three things: 1. Helps you build Job Descriptions that are more neutral in nature. What we know now are the vast majority of JD’s are written very heavily to favor males; 2. Help control Unconscious Bias by giving you control to redact resumes as you see fit; 3. Build ‘Scripted Interviews’ that allow you to assign questions to hiring managers who score the answers.

– Full integrations already built with Workday and Taleo, of which, if you’re using one of these systems you desperately need this help! Also, like most Saas products, TalVista can be fairly easily integrated into most ATSs.

– A leadership team that fully understands the end user of their product, and will build a roadmap that will continue to push the boundaries of helping organizations with their D&I strategies.

Let’s be honest. In the vast majority of organizations, Diversity and Inclusion has very little in terms of investment. We love to talk about it and act like it’s super important, but when you actually look at the investment made to make real change, most organizations can’t point to anything besides the possibility of hiring a D&I officer.

TalVista now gives TA and D&I leaders a real tool to add to their tech stack that will give them measurable results that align with their D&I strategy.

One of the goals of the TalVista team is to help organizations hire ‘nonhomogeneous’ teams. Take a look at your own team right now. Does it mostly look like you? Chances are it does. If you’re working in an organization and/or field where innovation and great decision making is critical to your success, research has shown that a homogeneous team is actually hurting your chances of success.

We all have unconscious bias. HR, TA, and D&I leaders are fighting every day to limit this bias but mostly fighting without any weapons. This is one reason I believe that TalVista’s technology will be successful. It’s the right time and the right tech to help solve the problem. I demoed TalVista this past week and it’s easy to use, with a very clean user interface and experience. Everyone on your team could use this product with limited training.

Your Weekly Dose of HR Tech: @LinkedIn Makes Some Changes to Help Candidates Apply Easier!

Posted on May 22, 2018 by Tim Sackett

Today on the Weekly Dose I take a look at some recent changes LinkedIn has made to their platform to make it easier for candidates. Here is the announcement from LinkedIn on two of the new enhancements that were made:

How You Match on job postings shows members how they stack up to the experience needed for a role based on the skills on their profile and recruiters can save time when reviewing candidates by immediately seeing how an applicant fits a specific role, within LinkedIn’s job management page.

1-Click Apply gives job-seekers the option to save basic information, including a resume, to apply for a job with a single click (desktop) or tap (mobile).

While these two features were made with candidates in mind, with record low unemployment in so many functions and markets, employers will also take advantages of these two additions.

LinkedIn has enormous amounts of data and the “How You Match” feature demonstrates a little psychology behind the data. On the surface, I think most TA pros would look at this and think “it won’t matter! Candidates don’t care if they match a job or not, they just apply, regardless.”

From a psychological standpoint, though, I think most employers will actually see an uptick in quality from this change. When LinkedIn’s matching technology tells you that you don’t match very well, most sensible people, won’t apply to that job.

When I first heard of the 1-Click Apply feature, I got scared that this was a recipe for mass applies from non-qualified candidates. That was my initial reaction, but I think LI brilliantly put these two features together to control this behavior.

Candidates want less friction when it comes to applying for jobs (that’s what Google’s data taught us with Google for Job’s algorithm). So, LinkedIn’s 1-Click Apply is the Holy Grail of an application process! We should all be striving to get to 1-Click Apply!

The truth is, in most ATS environments, today, it’s almost impossible to get to a one-click apply process, so kudos for LI for making this happen on their platform. While many will say they have one-click apply, most of those are based on you using your LI profile to make this happen, which usually takes an additional click or two.

The time is right for 1-Click Apply from an employer’s standpoint as well. Right now, most of us in TA are begging for more applications, so anything to make it easier for candidates to apply is welcome! The key is ensuring you get good quality with those additional applies, and I think LI did a good job trying to help out employers as well by launching the matching feature at the same time.

Acting like the candidate is the most important thing has become very vogue as of late for TA tech companies. Google started it with GFJ. Indeed is now trying to act like candidates matter, for the first time in their history. Now, LinkedIn joins the welcome wagon in letting candidates know they matter, and based on demographics and economic conditions, it looks like candidates will matter for a long while!

Want help with your HR & TA Tech company – send me a message about my HR Tech Advisory Board experience.

How Long Should It Take a Candidate to Make a Decision on a Job Offer?

Posted on May 21, 2018 by Tim Sackett

When you make a candidate an offer, how long do you give them to tell you they want the job or not? 24 hours? 3 days? 1 week? Immediately?

For two decades I’ve been in the camp of a candidate should be able to tell you ‘yes’ or ‘no’ immediately, or you (the recruiter and hiring manager) did something wrong in closing! But, I think I’ve changed my stance on this, if “fit” is really important for the position, your culture, etc.

Here’s the deal, if job and/or company fit is really important to your organization. The candidate should take as long as they need to, to make sure that your organization is the one for them. That might mean they need to finish up other interviews, do more research, go through counter-offers, etc.

So, if that takes two or three weeks, so be it. The fit is critical for you and you actually want the candidate to take their time with this decision.

I feel so strongly about this, I think you should actually make candidates wait 72 hours after you offer them the job, to give you an answer! Yes! You won’t accept an acceptance from them until they’ve taken 72 hours to really think about the job, the new boss, the organization, everything!

Why wait 72 hours if they already know!?

A ‘cooling down’ period will give them some time to get through the infatuation period of getting the offer! It will give them some time to really think about your job, their current job, other jobs they might be considering. This time is important because too often, too many people get that offer and at that moment everything feels so awesome!

After a couple of days they come down from the high of being desired by you and start to think clearly, and all of sudden you’re not as pretty as you looked two days ago, or you’re even more pretty by playing hard to get.

But what if a candidate gets cold feet by this technique?

That’s a real concern especially with historic unemployment in many markets and fields. If you force a candidate to wait 72 hours there is a good chance someone else might come in an offer them a job!

Yep! That actually would be awesome if that happened, because then you would really know! Do they love you, or did they just fall in love with someone else!? Remember, this isn’t for every organization. This is only for organizations where fit is critical to your organizational culture.

If a candidate gets cold feet by another offer or by waiting 3 days, they don’t really believe your organization is the one for them. They don’t believe what you have is their dream job or organization. Also, if you get cold feet by having them wait, you don’t really believe fit is important!

So, how long should it take a candidate to decide if your job offer is right for them?

There is not one right answer. Each of us has our own internal clock to make those decisions. If you force a candidate to decide immediately upon offer, that speaks to your culture. If you let candidates decide on their timeline, that also speaks to your culture.

In a perfect world, I still believe if the process works as designed, and everyone pre-closed like they should, both you and a candidate should be able to make a decision when the offer is placed on the table. But, honestly, how often does our process work perfectly?

Hit me in the comments with what you believe is the proper amount of time you should give a candidate to decide whether or not they’ll accept your job offer?

Managing Change in HR and TA – What Would Sackett Do?

Posted on May 18, 2018 by Tim Sackett

Hey gang! On May 21st (this upcoming Monday) there is a free online virtual summit around change and innovation. I was invited to participate and you can hear my interview on thoughts around innovation in HR and Talent Acquisition, as well as, how I think we (HR and TA) should be change leaders in our organizations!

As a featured guest I’m able to share FREE passes to the Summit. I don’t think they really understood how many people read the blog! They said my free passes are unlimited by just clicking on the link – so Enjoy! I know there are a bunch of other great folks speaking as well around change and innovation so check them out!

Whether you are a leader who is experiencing a change in your organization, an HR professional who is dealing with change, or someone looking to reinvent how you show up every day, you may benefit from conversations with some of the brightest thinkers in Change and Innovation around the world.

The Summit provides tools, strategies, and concepts on how to best lead change and navigate the future of work. Whether you’re leading a Fortune 500 organization or looking to reinvent yourself, this Summit is packed with insights and practices to promote innovative ideas and successfully implement change.

Click this link for your FREE Pass and be sure to catch my session!

The Change and Innovation Summit runs May 21st-25th and it’s on-demand, meaning you can come in any time during that week (if you’re signed up) and catch the sessions you want when you want since they will all be recorded.

Go check it out and let me know what you think. The virtual conference format has become popular in the past couple of years. It allows thousands of people access to some great information that previously they just couldn’t afford to travel to conferences, or couldn’t afford the time away from the office! For whatever reason, attending this ‘virtually’ becomes a great option for everyone!

“In Transition” Isn’t Helping You Find a New Job!

Posted on May 17, 2018 by Tim Sackett

I know you’ve seen this on resumes and profiles over the past few years! Someone is looking for work and they title their profile “In Transition”.

Quick – without taking five seconds to think about, be honest, what do you think when someone says, “In Transition” on their resume, cover letter, LI profile, etc.? Put it in the comments!

My guess is, like me, it’s not positive. If it’s not positive, you should remove it from your profiles immediately!

When I read “In Transition” my immediate thought is “why are you in transition? Must not be good! No one wants to be in ‘transition’!” A ‘transition’ can mean many things when it comes to your career. Some of those are positive, but I think the collective will see most of the reasons as negative.

I think the reason I read “In Transition” in a negative light when it comes to talking about careers, is that for me it makes me believe you don’t really know what you want. I’m not ‘in transition’, I’m making a change and this is exactly what I’m looking to do.

Reason’s you might be ‘transitioning’ in your career and now you are looking for another job:

Potential reasons for transitioning:

Retirement from your current role (which many will take as a negative because of age bias)
Completely switching careers (could be a positive, if you’re willing to start at entry level income for the career you’re choosing to go into)
You got fired
You got laid off/company closed
You had your own business, that has ended, now you’re finding your next gig
You took a leave of absence for personal reasons (FMLA, went back to school, child rearing, aging parent, etc.)

So, I’m on record saying that using the phrase, “In Transition” isn’t good for someone seeking a job.

The bigger question than becomes is there a good phrase for people who are out of job and want to get a job that TA pros won’t immediately believe is negative?

I’m not sure there is one, especially if the real reason you’re transitioning is negative! That seems obvious, but you would be shocked at how many messages I get from people ‘in transition’ that are wanting my advice on how to say ‘positively’ they were fired.

My advice is usually to tell the best version of the truth you can come up with, and try to back up that version of the truth is a lot of people who will give you a positive work reference. Ideally, from the place you just left, even if that last job ended in a termination for performance.

What experienced TA pros and hiring managers realize is that not every termination is really do to actual poor performance. Sometimes it’s just a simple personality conflict between the manager you worked for and yourself. That isn’t great, but it’s better than you just couldn’t do the job!

Here are some phrases I might use instead of “In Transition” –

– “I quit my last position because…”

– “I retired from my last position and I’m looking to work “X” number of years in “X” type of position…”

– “I haven’t worked in “X time” because…, and I’m looking for…”

– “I got laid off from my last position…” (This one seems easy, except so many people now use this when they were the only person laid off, but everyone else kept their jobs! That’s not a layoff, that’s just a nice way to get fired! So, you better be able to back this up because great TA pros will find out the truth!)

– “I started my own business. It failed (or it succeeded or I decided it wasn’t for me). I’ve got the entrepreneurial bug out of me and I want to help an organization succeed in the following way…”

So, what do you think TA leaders and pros? Does “In Transition” scare you off of a candidate?

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Career Confessions of Gen Z: Is Humor Generational?

Posted on May 16, 2018 by Tim Sackett

Growing up, I had to deal with many instances of embarrassment. Not only was I a normal awkward pre-teen that had braces and didn’t know how to talk to people, I also had Tim Sackett as my father. As many of you know, my Dad has a very interesting sense of humor. My Mom likes to explain it like this: when you’re making a joke, there’s a line and if you cross that line, you enter a place where you can offend someone. My Father has no regard for this line whatsoever and is constantly crossing it. Many people (me included) think my Dad is hilarious, but I always was constantly worried that my Dad was going to embarrass me in some way or offend someone.

Recently, there seems to be a gap between certain generations and what they find funny. We are seeing more and more instances of people getting offended or feeling uncomfortable from a joke made by someone from a different generation. While this type of thing isn’t uncommon, it can be particularly tricky in an era where being more culturally aware or politically correct is more of a concern. There are two types of situations to watch out for when thinking about humor in a workplace: instances of potential insulting or instances of a lack of understanding.

When it comes to offensive jokes, the bottom line is just don’t be a dick. My best advice is to follow the age-old Golden Rule: if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. If you avoid making negative jokes about a certain group, then you most likely are avoiding any potential harm.

There is some gray area with this and I would say to avoid anything that might be slightly perceived as negative in situations where you are new or you might not know the receivers of your joke super well. In these instances, a good general guideline is to not say anything you wouldn’t want your Mom hearing you say. If you’re more comfortable with the people around, then go for it. Also, I am not a woman but I will do my best to speak for them, so please don’t say anything creepy. It’s just gross (I’m looking at you old men).

The other category of humor problems is a lack of understanding. In certain circumstances, there is an obvious age gap and this can lead to a difference in humor. One of my favorite recent examples of this is the obsession with Tide Pods. Personally, I hate Tide Pods because on multiple occasions, they have stained my clothes but that’s beside the point. Gen-Zer’s love to claim that Tide Pods looked good enough to eat and every parent in the world lost their mind. My generation thought that the countless memes about Tide Pods were hilarious, but Moms everywhere thought that the teens of the world were really stupid and wanted to eat laundry detergent.

While some idiot probably did try one, this wasn’t a generational movement to kill ourselves by ingesting harmful chemicals. In these cases, maybe just let it be. If you don’t understand something from a generation, then try to avoid making a joke about it. And if you really don’t understand something, just ask! For the most part, people are nice and more than willing to explain something.

Growing up with my Father, I have gained a pretty good tolerance for offensive jokes but my overall point is don’t be an asshole. My Dad may have made some pretty vulgar and raunchy things in the day, but he’s only done them with good intentions; he wasn’t actively trying to piss anyone off (Editor/Dad note: Yes I was!). If you approach your jokes in this same way, then you more than likely will be fine.